#not sure about his eyes tbh i was using the current model

[starberry-cupcake]

After a weekend that exhausted me, I am finally able to come back to this book. My reacts proved useful to remind me where I left of, who would have thought.

previously, on harrowberry the ninth:

this happened

also, harrowberry is courtesy of @lady-harrowhark

after which I suggested the following album cover as a representation of her

currently, chapters 14-16:

"The Mithraeum, the seat of the First Reborn! The Sanctuary of the Emperor of the Nine Houses, the bolthole of God"

I don't want to sound like gideon

I really don't

but I have to be entirely honest here

I read that sentence twice, at separate times

and neither of those times did I read "bolthole"

MOVING ON

harrowberry is settled in a room which was made for a lyctor that never was

I don't know if this is at all important but it caught my eye

I wonder what happened there

and I am, as we have established, fixating on very particular things

the emperor johnny bravo has a room that's described as a locked tomb, but harrow says that, unlike the other locked tomb, she's not interested to see what's in this one

on the one hand, I want to know what this guy's actually doing but, on the other, I don't care about what's going on in his intimacy

harrow is also surprised that he gets embarrassed

which I don't, because he should be embarrassed and ashamed about all of the stuff that is going on in general

I don't know specifics and I don't know details, but I know he's at fault

like we say over here, I've got no evidence but I've got no doubt

he tells harrowbean about the BOE

he says they hate the nine houses and that they have agents who turn planets against them

they got themselves a leader about 25 years before harrow was born, who made things more difficult for johnny man

let's bring back the timeline I'm constantly discarding and bringing back

we've been told now that: this leader showed up 25 years before harrow was born, they disappeared nearly 20 years ago and gideon was born 18 years ago in space to a mom who was brain dead upon arriving at ninth

there's also the whole eggs thing that idk if it has something to do with this or not but we're not totally throwing anything away here

we've moved from a cork board to a 3d model at this point

emperor johnny boo is blaming these people for not!dulcinea going ballistic

idk johnny man, you kind of fucked that up on your own I think, but go off, I guess

he also says that the BOE folks hate necromancers and necromancy

I don't wanna be making assumptions with little to no info (literally all I've been doing) but all I've seen so far is these people teaching harrow to kill planets

that's not what miss frizzle told me I should be doing when she wore the most iconic looks in television history

maybe if the emperor dressed like this I'd be trusting him more

emperor johnny also clocked harrow being a ninth kid smoothie

because harrow was doing theorems in the river and only one other person ever did that before

the person who founded the sixth

we're ok with the sixth because camilla came from there

when harrow starts telling him the smoothie story, the emperor says "This was...all so different...before we discovered the scientific principles" and proceeds to tell her that her parents basically did a mini resurrection

he says "I have committed the same act, and I know the price I had to pay" and calls her "a walking miracle"

to which harrow responds "I have just told you that I am the product of my parents' genocide"

emperor, my man

he says "nobody has to know" about the kid smoothie

there sure are a lot of things people aren't supposed to know or ask about over here in the emperor's bolthole

*me, high fiving gideon's force ghost*

he says the initials of BOE mean "blood of eden" and that Eden is "someone they left to die"

then he quotes shakespeare??? I think king lear???

“How sharper than a serpent's tooth it is To have a thankless child”, that quote

I'm not super knowledgeable when it comes to shakespeare tbh but...ominous

he also says "once you turn your back on something, you have no more right to act as though you own it"

and harrow thinks "at the time, that had made perfect sense to you"

that's pinned under the "hope for later" category

NEXT CHAPTER

harrow talks to ice cube barbie in her dreams

ice cube barbie says she's died twice

THEN, AND THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT

harrow asks her if she has ortus's eyes or if her eyes are hers and what her eyes are like

and ice cube barbie says "she asked me not to tell you"

this is me, adding another thing to the "hopeful hints for gideon" shrine I am building

chapter 16

harrow asks yandere twin about her diary and she says it has been burned on her own orders

more hints for my theory of past!harrow knowing a lot and planning ahead

harrowcita calls lyctortus (name suggested by the reply gang, thank you reply gang) "the other one"

which could be "other" as in "other lyctor" or as in "other ortus", so it's fine either way

harrow is worried about not!dulcinea still being a threat

AREN'T WE ALL

AREN'T WE ALL

I SURE AM, ALWAYS

she should have been flushed into space

harrow thinks not!dulcinea is moving and yandere twin calls her "crazycakes"

then we start going a bit more in depth about augustine

I have come to understand that he isn't called "saint of patience" because he's patient

he's called "saint of patience" because that's what you have to practice when you're around him

good god, this man

he has the charisma of the fifth but the disagreeable nature of the eighth

here I am, making judgment on these people I only know like 2 representatives of, but anyway

he's like if magnus hadn't discovered a passion for baking and had instead decided his hobby was to be passive aggressive and thinking too highly of himself

his cav was his brother, apparently

harrow thinks he's hollow inside

he is absolutely horrendous to mercygirl

BUT, MOST IMPORTANTLY

he also alludes to not!dulcinea moving and thinks mercygirl is doing it

I don't know about this, you guys

two mulders in one recap is what you get when I have been forced to not read for a couple days

I think fox mulder represents my energy in these recaps

Augustine The Unpleasant mentions that johnny j has "spent the last 10 thousand years on a perpetual search-and-destroy mission out of, as far as I can tell, purely symbolic retribution"

great, that sounds fantastic for god to do

and that "I wouldn't set myself up as his replacement A.L. He doesn't need another bodyguard, and even she was significantly more lucid than you are" (you being mercygirl)

I had mentioned the possibility of ice cube barbie being this AL person, we still don't know, but this AL is "she"

let's put that in the 3D model

augustine calls chad a "nice boy", which tracks for him being a Senior Chad

he treats harrow badly, which we absolutely don't stan over here in the harrow respect corner

harrow obliterates him with a comeback and he calls her Anastasia (You were born in a palace by the sea / A palace by the sea? Could it be?) like the previous ninth

these people love comparing their old pals to everyone they meet, even if they supposedly didn't get along much

harrow also makes fun of yandere twin for being what gideon would call "a weenie" over augustine

then we get the augustine and johnny explanation of how to kill the beast

I am all for information but this whole thing gives me the worst vibes

basically he says the beasts (disrespectful name) eat planets like oysters and then keep the thanergy as armor

the beast can inhabit anything it's thanergetically connected to it via their death

like that which they kill

they travel as river projections

they have agents, which he describes like the borg in star trek

individual forms connected to its hive

the whole lyctor thing, having a necromancer's ability with a cav's training to take over the body, seems to be a key to fighting these things

because the necro part goes down into the river to do the thing and the cav can take over the defense of the body

this, I think, could be what we saw harrow doing in the prologue, the projection thing

but harrow's body isn't protected, because she's "lyctor lite"

because there's hope for gideon or so help me john

which might be why yandere twin was telling her she would not be guarded if she did what she was about to do

I am very intrigued as to what harrow will come to know to push her to do what she did

also, she got stabbed, so I'd like to know if she's fine

but we have 0 guarantees of anything over here in the mithrandir or whatever

the emperor's bolthole

god, what has gideon done to me

they say the point of the combat is to throw the beast's soul into the abyss and hope it doesn't come back

that's what I've been trying to do with not!dulcinea all this time

ALSO still no camilla

see you next time and thank you for not hating the length of these things ♥

[iwritenarrativesandstuff]

Love seeing what stats you get from reading each of the books about your teammates’ Personas because I like to think it gives you a little more insight into what they’re strong in and what their awakening helped them improve:

Arsène- Knowledge (Joker’s awakening was about him deciding to take action, which he does mostly by gathering information and learning various new skills and maximizing his advantages)

Captain Kidd- Guts (Ryuji’s is pretty straightforward; he just decided to be less apologetic about who he is and take risks to help others)

Zorro- Kindness (we don’t see Morgana’s awakening, which makes me kind of sad tbh, but we do know he is very much about acting the gentleman, and his arc has a lot to do with letting go of his insecurities related to his very pragmatic way of viewing relationships and opening himself up to being a true part of a team and a family)

Carmen- Charm (again, very straightforward. Ann takes back her beauty and sexuality and uses it to inspire others and find her own strength)

Goemon- Guts (Yusuke had averted his eyes from the truth for so long because of his precarious situation and because it hurt him. his choice to stand up to Madarame took a tremendous amount of courage, as does his ability to keep forging onwards through his doubts about his art)

Johanna- Kindness (Makoto is all about coming out of her role as model student and attempting to learn how to relate to her classmates and friends so she can support others better)

Necronomicon- Guts (Futaba is very similar to Yusuke - she faces her fear head on and finds the truth she buried, and is also training herself to overcome her fears in the real world as well)

Milady- Proficiency (haven’t gotten very far with Haru’s SL yet but it does seem like she’s now in control of the company so she’s going to have to learn how to be quite skillful. She has a very finicky hobby (gardening), her persona is great for technical damage, and what I love most about Haru being associated with proficiency is that it directly flies in the face of her father treating her like an object with no value other than family business ties. Haru is skilled as hell. Fuck you)

Cendrillon- Charm (I don’t currently know what to make of this yet. Kasumi’s awakening was really weird in the first place. I guess it’s because all eyes are on her and she has a lot of expectations - her routines are about grace and strength and flexibility)

Robin Hood- Guts (tbh I don’t know what to do with this either. I thought for sure Akechi was going to be knowledge like Joker… but apparently not. I guess detective boy is gutsy.)

[destinyc1020]

By the way Hollywood is i would just b content with Kaia being in her late 20s n Austin in his late 30s bt 20 (wen they met) is just so.. young. I actually enjoy Kaias book club n she said in the last one that was told a lot that she was very "mature" n a "old soul" when she was young n i definetly get that vibe from her, i feel like she thinks shes more mature bt by her interviews she sounds like her age to me tbh (nt a bad thing though shes still seems more stable than a lot of other nepo baby models).

I did think her n JE were going to last longer, they give off the same kinda vibe imo. In his print interviews he seems pretentious/wanting to emulate old hollywood stars or Health Ledger n Kaia mentioned smthin about how an artist isnt going to sacrifice their movie for someones kid (wrong lol) cuz thats not how art is made n she wants to "make art". Just by those comments i got why they were a couple ☠️ both of them can just sound very eye rolling to put it plainly lol kaia seems a lil more geniune wen shes nt ignorant about nepotism tho lol

Im srry bt the "rent a model gf" gave me a lil chuckle lmao it def helps wen her last n current bf have been actors n she wants to b an actress now. Anytime someone mentions her its either cuz her mom or shes "_'s gf". I think shes prob going to continue to have a deal with the paps until or if her acting career takes off cuz they give her visibility in hollywood

Late 20s would be fine....shoot... even 25 would be better and just fine imo lol 😆

I've always liked the fact that Kaia had her book club, and it's smthg she's done for years. She's a VERY avid reader, so I'm not even surprised that Austin was attracted to her, coz he loves to read also! 😊 Like, I can totally understand why they clicked, cuz they actually have quite a bit in common.

While I do think that Kaia has been forced to grow up VERY quickly in the modeling world, and probably isn't a "regular person's" 21 year old, she's STILL very young (imo), and pretty naïve and out of touch.... You can tell by her interviews. The funny thing is, she doesn't even realize it yet, which is why it's so ironic.

I'm not sure of the context of what she meant by "making art", so I won't comment on that, but part of me almost feels like she's just repeating buzz words lol. At least with JE, I feel like that's who he truly is, and what he truly wants. Although they sometimes looked miserable together lol, I actually think they were better matched? They were closer in age, and seemed to have similar backgrounds.

ALL of us were more naïve at that age though, so it's not a slight towards her, it's just a reminder that she doesn't have much life experience yet. 🤷🏾‍♀️ According to Psychologists, your brain isn't even FULLY developed until your mid-late 20s!

JE grew up pretty privileged, and so did Kaia. When you've been raised around wealth your entire life like Kaia has, it's hard to know how to relate to "common folk".

Re: JE.....

I'm not even surprised he's with Olivia Jade rn lol. 😅 They've actually lasted waaaay longer than I expected, so I guess he stopped cheating on his gfs lol. 🤭

Re: Rent-a-Model-Girlfriend...

Lol I'm sorry rofl 🤣 But after dating Pete Davidson, Jacob Elordi, and now Austin Butler lol, it just seems like I'm noticing a pattern here rofl 🤣 (Hot, up-and-coming actors who are going places lol)

As far as Austin is concerned.....

I'm probably gonna ruffle some Kaustin/Kaia feathers by saying this lol, but I'll say it anyway since I'm ALWAYS 💯% honest here on my blog....

First off, I'll just say, I think Austin is actually a very nice guy, and definitely seems way more humble and in touch with reality due to his background.

But boy does he have a bad woman picker lol 😂 Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying the women he's been with have been "bad women" at all (I actually didn't mind Vanessa back when they were dating pre-covid 🥴), I just think that his personality doesn't always align with who he's dating. So his choices are sometimes like, "seriously?" to me lol. Almost like, he doesn't realize that he could do better. 👀

Tbh, I've often wondered if maybe he got with Kaia because after the lengthy Vanessa rlshp and breakup, maybe he just wanted smthg more low-key, easy maintenance, a pretty girl on your arm for movie premieres and press tours so you're not asked about your ex all the time 🙄, and just someone who can be private, and not rustle feathers too much, or be overly obnoxious on social media. 👀

I could be dead wrong, but I kinda get the impression that he's more so focused on his career right now. Yes, he's been in the business for almost 20 years, but he's JUST now getting his big break, so he's a bit behind than some others who got their big breaks in their early 20s or younger. He could def date an older woman again in the future, but I don't think at this moment in his life that he's really looking for an older woman who might be wanting or pressuring marriage right now.... hence, KAIA. 👀 🤷🏾‍♀️

I actually wouldn't mind Kaia too much if she were at least 25 and came from a regular background like himself. She's private, she doesn't say anything about the rlshp, and many famous ppl need you to be that way when you're dating such a high-profile man. Maybe she took notes from Zendaya lol 🤭

Anyway, I think his focus at the moment is his career. You saw how QUICKLY those engagement rumors got squashed right lol? Rofl 🤣 😂 I'd be a little surprised if he gets engaged to Kaia anytime soon. (I could be totally wrong though)

But he is def a guy who seems to prefer stable, long-term rlshps though, so they will probably last quite a while! They might even surprise everyone and get engaged one day, but I don't see it happening tomorrow, in other words. 🤷🏾‍♀️

Honestly?? I actually think Austin would do well to just be SINGLE for 6 months lol. I know that's a TALL order for a handsome, nice guy in the industry lol, but imo I think it would do him well. He's been through a LOT. Not just his mom's death, but other things in his life as well.

Relationship-wise, he went from an 8-yr rlshp with Vanessa, to then a massive breakup, to then a rebound "situationship" with his Elvis costar Olivia, to then another rebound fling with Lily Depp lol.... like laawwwd dude rofl 🤣 😂 Can't you just be single lol? 🤣

I'll give him a slight pass though, cuz 8 years is a very long time to be with someone, and then NOT have anybody.... I always say that the longer your relationship was, the longer you rebound also. I don't even think they broke up in person face-to-face. 👀

Anyway, IF he and Kaia do breakup one day, I'll be looking to see who he gets with next, cuz if it's some young 21 year old again I'm gonna be giving him the MASSIVE side-eye.

🤨

Anyway, those are my thoughts/opinions.... you don't have to agree. 🤷🏾‍♀️

[crystal-meloetta12]

hello, I would love to see your yokai watch ocs 💖

Ok so Ive been putting this one off a little bit for a multitude of reasons, most of which are some variant of "god Im so cringe", but I absolutely will ramble about them now that Ive been asked. This will be going under a read more because I go through 5 breakdowns and again am very cringe. I will also be showing each OC through a Picrew because trust me when I say my art is absolutely god awful, but all of them will be sourced.

Catherine

(Source: https://picrew.me/en/image_maker/1787745)

Ok, so she's basically the main protagonist of my little sector of hell. Her main watch model is the same as Katie's, but she does get upgrades overtime. Overall, she presents herself as a pretty stereotypical nice girl to those she talks to, and also shows a genuine interest in wanting to use her watch and skills to help those around her. Outside of yokai activities, she really enjoys all that she deems to be "cute", like Next HarMEOWny and clothing. She tends to be the most sympathetic of the party, opting to want to help yokai through words and actions as opposed to fighting them.

While a lot of her interests are genuine, some of her mannerisms are put on for those around her. She was very isolated for a lot of her childhood between consistently working parents and just not really being included in social circles, so a lot of her stereotypical cutesy vibes are just as much the only way she knows how to gain attention as much as they are for her own enjoyment. Because of this, she has a really bad tendency to become dependant on her relationships to the yokai around her, thinking that it's her only worth as a person and resultinf in an almost hero complex. So much so she often has a Pepillion on hand for when smiles are much harder to force.

(I KIND of want to add some neurodivergencies onto her, but I want to make sure I understand what Im talkkng about as well as I pretend I do before I actually go through with it)

Despite that, her primary go-to yokai is a Frostina she bonds with early on. She also usually has a Ratelle on hand for fashion-based things.

Her relationships with people are overall really chill, as she's generally nice to people. She is more open with the other watch users and her own friend group, allowing herself to be a bit more silly and goofy around them. The main stand out as of right now is I like to think Kyubi tried to flirt with her at one point as part of his "quest for hearts", and ended up learning what a lesbian is that day.

Hana

(Source: https://picrew.me/en/image_maker/186583)

Hana's somewhat inspired off of the whole "robot from the future" line of yokai, and is actually a robot herself who was designed to help humans and yokai get along better. While designed to look like a human child, her whole body basically serves as a yokai watch, with her eyes basically acting as lenses that can pinpoint yokai. Because of this, she most often takes on the "navigator" role in more combat based scenarios, basically acting as the player in game. She was pretty much sent to current time as soon as it was confirmed shw was functional, so she has no real memories or way to travel to the time she came from.

Hana's the most carefree and childlike member of the cast, knowing a lot of things logistically but still experiencing them for the first time. Sometimes her curiosity and wonder can actually lead to trouble, but can usually be pulled out of it by others if not herself. She's actually probably the most emotionally well rounded of all of them tbh, mostly just having the occasional "Im not human" crisis and some trauma I'll get to later.

In terms of her yokai team, she mainly gets access to Don-chan who shares in her sometimes endless seeming energy, as well as Komajiro (not for any major reason, I just say so). She also has a Bruff in her team, mainly to act as a somewhat older brother figure who can ward off trouble if needed.

Mariah

(Source: https://picrew.me/en/image_maker/3595)

Okay,

This girl is definitely the most subject to change, mostly because I made her core concepts back when I only played up to Yokai Watch 2 and was unaware I'd be submitting myself to Nightmare Lore! She's honestly recieved a ton of edits up to this point as well, my main strategy being "fuck it we ball" every time new lore presents itself to me. The current hurdle I have to pass for peak Blorbo Writing is Forever Friends, which I will watch after the Ensemble Stars interest dies down a little bit and I can actually continue Shadowside.

All that being said, as of writing this post, Mariah is a half human half yokai experiment facilitated by Ancient Enma to further push the "yokai human get along" thing until his ideals eventually shifted. Thus, she is treated as a member of the Enma family even if not related by blood. She is incredibly powerful with a high aptitude for yokai skills, althlough nowhere neae as strong as the man of all time himself. In terms of scaling, she probably is in between Zazel and Enma, though there is a sizable gap between all three of them. Because she was meant to be human, though, overexertion is a serious issie. She can only exert so much power without collapsing without other external circumstances. But with power like that doesn't just come responsibility, but pressure.

In the main group, she's the more collected one of the three, reeling in Catherine and Hana when they get more out of hand. Although, this is not to say that she doesnt get into antics of her own. Given her half yokai status, she doesn't really have much need for a watch, though she isn't above summoming Venoct for a fight. Shw does havw a slightly more human disguise, though it mainly changes her hair and eyes to be black.

Mariah and Enma get along really well, and share a sibling sort of bond. They tend to conversw over food, and she occasionally joins in for the "Enma's Holiday" manga shenanigans. She does end up in major conflicts of interest with Zazel on occasion, thus causing them to butt heads now and then, but they also genuinely care for eachother's well being.

Also I might rename her to be just Mari idk lol

Peg + some Shadowside discussion

(Source: https://picrew.me/en/image_maker/1403004)

(I know, I know, Im gonna rename her eventually. It was an i side joke that isnt rlly funny anymore tbh)

... okay so is now a good time to mention Catherine fucking dies-

I don't really have the specifics planned out, but I do want her to eventually fall to some greater threat. She is remembered lovingly, albeit not much of the front-less her survived. Enough for her to be out of the way by the time the watch is banished. I am admittedly breaking ome of the rules of Shadowside, that being she is very much remembered by everyone.

Anyways, enter Peg, a shut in living in 2040 who ends up coming across the Arcane. Like Catherine, Peg lived most of her life in isolation from overworking parents and hitting bad luxk in social circles, only she copes through using her alone-ness as a shield, going out of her way to avoid letting people in. For most of her life, this has been fine, as she's able to excell in all sorts of random things completely on her own. Yokai, however, are one of the few things you can't go through alone. She actually has the most trouble out of the cast trying to get things done with them, as her abrasive nature ends up pissing off the yokai she tries to talk to if anything. And while Hana and Mariah are clearly traumatized by what happened and trying to work through it, everything Peg learns about Catherine builds a really bad imposter syndrome, and another person's shadow so big it feels impossible to crawl out.

She does get along with Hana the best, who still retains a lot of her wonder in the world, which opens up Peg's eyes somewhat in turn. Where she and Mariah sometimes feel more like work partners, Hana could be much more considered a friend. Im not really familiar enough with the Shadowside yokao to give her a proper team (as I only have the anime to go off of), but if we are ripping canon rules apart further, I think she'd largely have a Wydeawake amd a B3-NK1. I also want to give Hana something kinda similar to the Yokai Watch Ogre but idk Im indecisive lol

I've also been considering the possibility of Cath wandering around as a yokai, but the ideas I've had are more "trauma demon" than anything.

Alice

(Source: https://picrew.me/en/image_maker/41329)

Okay so a lot of her core development has also been largely put on hold in a hellscape of "Crystal needs to watch Forever Friends but hrrng no motivation", but she is alive during tne time period that would take place, which according to the wiki is also when Nathaniel woild havw been a kid. She comes from a largely traditional family who doesn't give her much agency, and often sneaks out at night to do the things she'd really like. She's generally kind and open to the world, but doesn't have a single clue who she is as a person or what she wants to do in life.

I'd LIKE for her to be friends with a significantly younger Mariah (who has weird aging bc yokai growth stuff), but I don't know how possible that is because Enma Bullshit. Her party largely consists of classic yokai, a standout being a Smogling she befriends early on. She has the marble component of the yokai watch zero built into a necklace.

And that's just about everyone's basic introductions! Ive had these characters anywhere from "about a year" to "many, many years", but this is really the first time Ive openly discussed them, so I hope you enjoy! Please feel free to ask any questions about them if you'd like, and thank you again!

[dorefasolsido]

13. Hello, my alien, we’re each other’s mystery

***credit to original creator***

pick five random friends:

what is # one's name?

I’ll just call her Sam here.

guy or girl?

Girl.

his or her age?

26.

exactly where did you meet?

We first met online, on YT (it was a different time lol), and then we met officially when she came to visit me in my home country.

how long ago did you meet?

It’s going to be 12 years since online meeting and 7 years since irl meeting.

pick three words to describe # one.

Reliable, artistic, psychic lol

what is # two's name?

Chris.

guy or girl?

A guy.

his or her age?

27.

exactly where did you meet?

On a tennis court in Germany, when I went there to visit my cousin.

how long ago did you meet?

12 years ago.

pick three words to describe # two.

Chaotic, talkative, dramatic.

what is # three's name?

I’ll call her Sophie.

guy or girl?

Girl.

his or her age?

28.

exactly where did you meet?

At university, we were in the same department and group.

how long ago did you meet?

Soon gonna be 9 years. Which is actually wild.

pick three words to describe # three.

Introspective, careful, sarcastic.

what is # four's name?

Mimi.

guy or girl?

Girl.

his or her age?

30.

exactly where did you meet?

Also at uni, same friend group as number 3.

how long ago did you meet?

Also gonna be 9 years soon.

pick three words to describe # four.

Sweet, open-minded, understanding.

what is # five's name?

Ivy.

guy or girl?

Girl.

his or her age?

28.

exactly where did you meet?

In high school, we were in the same class.

how long ago did you meet?

Soon gonna be 13 years ago :o

pick three words to describe # five.

Assertive, outgoing, confident.

have you ever kissed # two?

Nope.

how about # one?

Nope.

have you ever smacked # one?

Maybe in a playful way.

will you see # three soon?

Yup, we should go to the cinema together.

how about # five?

When I go to my hometown, yes.

is # one cute?

Sure.

does # four have blue eyes?

I think so, they’re kind of blue-green.

does # four have good hair?

Yes?

does # two have a crush?

I’m not sure. My cousin used to say he had a crush on me, but let’s hope that’s not the case anymore.

rate # four's looks.

Lol not gonna do that to a friend.

rate # five's personality.

Or that.

are you dating # one?

Nopes.

do you want to date # one?

No, but tbh, it would be easier if we were romantically into each other because then everything would just make sense. We’re not, though -- both aces, and she’s aroace too.

is # three outgoing?

Nope. Most of my friends aren’t lol

is # three goofy?

I wouldn’t describe her as that, but she has her moments.

would you kiss # two?

Nope. But if you asked me a few years ago, the answer might have been a little different.

is # five fun to hang with?

Of course she is.

is # three easy to get along with?

I think she may come off as aloof or stand-offish at first, but she’s really super chill, so I’d say yes.

does # one have a sibling?

Yes, a younger sister.

does # two have a pet?

Not currently.

is # five taller than you?

Lol now that I think about it, all the friends I listed are taller than me.

is # three skinny?

Yup.

is # four tan?

Nope, she’s very pale.

where is # five from?

From here.

could # two be a model?

Lol probably not. I think he might be too short for a model, idk what the standards are.

would # four ever run away?

Like, from home? Nah, I don’t think that would even cross her mind.

were you ever drunk with # two?

He was drunk with me, but not vice versa because I don’t get drunk (my emetophobia could never). I was probably the tipsiest I’ve ever been one time when I was with him, though. He felt kinda sick and couldn’t finish his cocktail, so I took it instead, although I drank a 1L beer sometime before that and didn’t really want to. Luckily, I ate enough and took a one hour break between these two drinks, so it didn’t affect me as badly as it could have.

would # three ever smoke cigarettes?

Lol she doesn’t, but this reminds me of that one time she said that she was thinking she should start smoking at some point. She made it sound like she was gonna set an exact starting date in her calendar, which would kind of be in character too.

does # four like country music?

Nope.

does # five play a sport?

I don’t think she does now.

has # two ever been high?

Oh yes. Once we were high together.

could # three kill an animal?

I don’t think so.

could # four eat a box of oreos?

Probably? 

does # one live near you?

Sadly no, she’s over 1000 km away and I haven’t seen her in person for almost 5 years.

is # five going to college?

Not anymore, graduated.

could # three become a doctor?

I’m sure she could if she wanted to, but what a jump in career that would be.

ever been to a movie with # two?

We watched movies together and went to theatre once, but I don’t think we went to movies.

ever had a sleepover with # four?

Actually yes.

would you die for # one?

I don’t know if I would die for anyone tbh. Like, I’d do a lot for her, but I’d rather live for her than die. I also don’t want anyone to be willing to die for me.

would you lie for # five?

Sure.

does # one like pizza?

Who doesn’t?

would # two buy you lunch?

I’m sure he did once or twice, just like I did for him a few times.

where is # four right now?

Probably at home.

what is # five's favorite color?

I actually don’t know lol. Probably never came up. I expect she likes brighter, bolder colours though.

ever been to the movies with # three?

Yup.

ever slept in a bed with # four?

Hmmmm I’m not sure, but we might have shared it one time.

ever shared food with # five?

Maybe?

when did you see # one last?

In 2018 when she came to visit me for three weeks.

does # two play an instrument?

He was learning to play ukulele, but I’m pretty sure he dropped it by now lol

does # three speak spanish?

Actually yes. She’d say no, but she’s just very humble.

[enchanted-tatas]

Hi! Your Hivecraft server looks really interesting! I've seen someone play on a server modded with what is essentially a first person rpg version of Sburb, but I've never seen anyone do an Alternia based map before! That's really cool!!!!! I have a few questions about it tho:

1. Will you be able to choose if you're a Human or a Troll?

2. If you can, will you be able to choose your blood colour as a Troll? Or is there some kind of mechanism for that?

3. Will Trolls have lusii? And if they do, can you choose what they are?

4. Will the server be private?

5. If it's not, will it be only PC accessible or will there be PC and Mobile versions?

6. Will you add the Minestuck mod or is this more of a 'Slice of Life, Living on Alternia' kinda thing?

7. Any unique resources like Sopor Slime?

8. Will there be any Persterchum or Trollian-like thing on to allow players to communicate?

9. Even if there isn't, can the players still have speech quirks?

That's all of my questions for now! Hopefully you'll have time to answer them!

Thank you! I've heard of people doing stuff like that but I was always more of a fan of the alternia themed world building etc. This is my first time playing Minecraft though so this project is sort of a learning experience.

Lots of good questions here so I'll do my best to answer

1. I don't think that's something I'm gonna manage for people, they can change their skins if they want or make custom models but I'm not sure that I could implement that for other people myself

2. As far as I know I don't think Minecraft has any sort of blood effects unless a mod or resource pack is installed but I don't have anything like that here so far. I AM planning to make some placeable items that look like blood splatters in different colors though

3. I can make mobs of lusii in the future that just act as animals do in game so I'm sure people could tame them and give them name tags so they don't despawn. I've already made some purple bees and I do wanna play with custom mob models later

4. I think I'll probably make a discord for it later where I can see how many people are interested and get it opened once things are more built out. It'll be open publicly then but I don't wanna pay for server hosting every month so it can only be open if I'm actually online

5. I think Minecraft in general is capable of cross console play?? I could be wrong but I'm working on PC so idk how well mobile would work especially with resource packs

6. I've never heard of that mod before tbh but I'm trying so far to not use mods and only use resource packs I'm making because that way everything can be server side and people don't have to download to join. This might change depending on what I wanna put in though. I sort of imagined more as a "slice of life thing" in survival mode. Just a fun alien sandbox for people to play in

7. FUNNY U SAY THAT I did TRY to make a sopor liquid in MCreator and technically succeeded. It had its own properties and everything

Unfortunately, MCreator only works on 1.19.2 and I've been making everything else on 1.19.3 😔 I tried testing it out in a 1.19.2 world but it just didn't wanna cooperate. I'll probably just have to wait until MCreator updates to 1.20...

8. I think just the current in game chat will be what's used or people can discord each other if they like

9. They can if they type that way sure! I think there's websites where u can basically "translate" whatever you type into a custom quirk but it won't be implemented in the server specifically. People will have to type that way themselves, same as making skins

Thanks for your interest! I hope these answers were helpful I'm not experienced enough to put in all these gui type ideas lol but maybe someday 🤷 I'll be posting updates here and there on this blog so keep an eye out 👀

[atlaese]

Mr. Incredible

summary: one of your favourite restaurants gives out free desserts for couples in matching costumes. Unfortunately, Bucky isn’t your boyfriend and he isn’t too keen on dressing up. Oh well, maybe he does end up liking the costume and you. pairing: college!bucky x fem!reader tw: talking about food, talking about alcohol, eating, just very fluffy! words: 1.2K a/n: hi hi!! i wanted to kickstart my writing again, so i decided to write a little something centering halloween!! also, decided to try out the college au for myself, never thought i'd like that tbh haha. anyway, hope you guys enjoy! i wrote it in like an hour, haha!!

p.s. i now have a library blog! go follow @aeristhotle and turn on notifs to get notified when i update! p.p.s. dividers by @firefly-graphics

reblogs and comments are appreciated ✨💗

BUCKY BARNES MASTERLIST | MARVEL MASTERLIST

“C’mon Buck! We have to go tonight! For Halloween they’re giving out free desserts to couples who’re dressed up together!” you tugged on Bucky’s sleeve of his sweatshirt.

Bucky was currently sitting at his desk in his dorm, working on a last minute assignment that should be turned in before 6 am, a small frown on his face as he watched the red costume you had laid on his bed.

“Darling,” he sighed, “I really gotta finish this tonight.”

“Also, we’re not a couple, so I don’t think this deal applies to us,” he added, squinting at the bright screen in front of him again.

“Bucky,” you whined, letting go of his sleeve and closing his laptop. “You’ve been staring at this screen for two hours already, just humour me with this and I’ll help you finish it after our date.”

This got his attention, as he turned his head just a little sideways, a small smirk now forming on his face as you pressed your lips together, realising your mistake.

“Date huh,” he teased flicking your wrist as you grabbed his laptop, holding it flush against your chest. “So what’s in it for me?”

You rolled your eyes, trying your best to not let his smug look distract you from getting free dessert.

“Well, free dessert, on top of a date with me,” you wiggled your eyebrows, shaking off the feeling that this could be something more.

It had been on your mind for quite some time, actually. Bucky always had a certain look and attitude around you, one he didn’t have around his friends or others.

His demeanor was just that bit softer, always looking out for you, making sure you’re okay.

During parties, you had heard he was quite the force to be reckoned with. The keg was his best friend and apparently you couldn’t keep him away from the table of shots that most parties had. But this never seemed to be the case when you went to one of those parties.

Whenever you were there too, his cup of beer never seemed to empty. The table of shots didn’t even seem interesting to him anymore. The only thing that mattered to him then, was if you were having fun at the party, and if the music was to your liking.

“A date? With you?” He asked surreptitiously, as if you were telling him a secret. “Are you sure? We’ll have to sell the whole thing.”

“Well, I- I mean, the dress-up part is the most important, I think?”

Was he? Was he enjoying this? Seeing you flustered? God, this man might be the death of you.

“Right, I saw something red flying by when you got in, what is it?” He now stood up and released his laptop from the titan hold you had on it.

“Oh!” You turned around, grabbing the costumes from his bed. “Only the best animation movie ever!”

Bucky tilted his head again, trying to figure out what the costume was supposed to be. It was mainly red, with some yellow accents on the chest.

“What’s that supposed to be? A knock-off deadpool?” He chuckled, his laptop now ignored on his desk as he took the costume from your outheld hands as you had another similar costume hanging over your arm.

“Hey hey, don’t discredit Mr and Mrs incredible, okay?” You scoffed, “they’re my role models.”

“The Incredibles you say,” he sighed, “must I wear this slinky spandex whilst on campus? I’m not ready to let go of my jock reputation.”

“It has a little mask, no one will recognize you, please Bucky.”

His gaze shifted from the costume to your face, your eyebrows pushed up and big eyes now on display, your lips in a little pout that he just couldn’t resist.

“Ugh, you’re a minx, you know that?” he turned around to go change in the bathroom, but also to hide the small smile that was now gracing his face.

“Thank you Bucky, I love you!” you shouted after him, pressing your lips together as you watched him shake his head.

“Okay, but this dessert is worth all the hassle, right?” you asked, shoving another spoonful of the tiramisù you were sharing with Bucky in your mouth.

“I guess,” he sighed, throwing a dirty look at the masks that were laying on the table. “The dessert is pretty good.”

“See! I told you so!” you grinned, leaning your chin on the tops of your hands as you smiled at him. “Aren’t you glad I saved you from that boring paper for a night of delicious food and good company?”

His faced softened a bit at your last words as he let on of his hands pluck at the spandex on your upper arm, his touch sending little sparks up your spine as his eyes connected to yours.

“Yeah, the food was alright, but the company was even better.”

His hand moved up, his fingers stroking over the fabric on your upper arm to your elbow, even higher, over the little bump of your wrist.

His touch felt magnetic, so much so that you dropped your right hand to the table, and his fingers encircled your wrist, his fingers then stroking over your hand and effectively grabbing in his without any doubts.

“Uhm, yeah, the company was great,” you croaked out, almost forgetting how to speak as his warm hand held onto yours.

“So when does this happen again?” he asked, his eyes still holding onto yours as the tiramisù was forgotten.

“I mean, the halloween deal? Next year,” you thought logically, a little bit confused by his question.

“So you mean to tell me I have to wait a full year before we can go on another date?”

Bucky now had a full-on smile on his face, not hiding his feelings anymore as he lightly squeezed your hand, “don’t tell me you can’t pencil me in sooner, sweetheart.”

“Oh,” was the only thing that came out of your mouth, as you tried to hide your embarrassement behind your hands, failing miserably as he now got a hold of both of your hands on the table.

“Uhm, we could do this again next week,” you said after clearing your throat. “Without the costumes, obviously.”

“Obviously,” he raised his eyebrows, his thumb rubbing soft circles on the back of your hand, a mesmerizing feeling.

“So, you ready to go?” he said as he stood up, pulling you up right as you looked around the restaurant to see other couples in matching costumes trickling out of the restaurant that was closing soon.

“Where to?” you said, still a bit shaken by everything that just happened.

“My dorm, you promised to help me with that paper,” he squeezed your hand, looking down at you with a smile.

“Man, the things I do for you,” you rolled your eyes good naturedly, happy to spend some more time with him.

“Hmm, I have a feeling you don’t mind,” he mused, his arm coming to rest around your shoulders as you walked towards the cash register to pay.

The only thing you could do is smile up at him, happy that whatever this weird date was, turned out to be so much better than you could ever expect.

[slasherhaven]

Could you possibly write brahms revealing himself to his s/o after they had a bad nightmare? S/o woke up screaming and crying and he came out of the walls and just listened through the door to make sure it was alright, then once he realized it was a nightmare he uses his kid voice to ask if he can come in and s/o just says "mhm.." too shaken up to even process that bras was asking to come in their room so he comes in and s/o is too upset to even care that well he literally just revealed himself and they just do grabby hands for him( tbh s/o is probably actually just half asleep-) so he comes over and cuddles them back to sleep petting them and using his adult voice to tell them it's ok and that hes there

That was a lot I'm sorry-

Brahms revealing himself to his future S/O when they have a nightmare:

It was strange. You were living alone in a big, creepy house, baby sitting a doll, and you were sure that the house was haunted by the ghost of the little boy the doll was modelled after. Yet, none of that freaked you out, that had become your normal, but a nightmare had you shooting up in bed in a cold sweat.

Brahms was hidden away in the walls, as usual, and was unable to sleep. His head was too busy, thoughts of you floating around. He wanted to show himself to you, he wanted you to see him. You had accepted the doll and the...ghost, so maybe you would accept him. 

But he was disturbed when he heard a scream coming from your bedroom. He jolted up and rushed towards your room, slipping out of the walls and creeping up to your bedroom door. Placing his ear against the door, he could hear you. You weren’t screaming now, you must have been startled by something. Now, you were crying, your breathing unsteady and ragged.

He recognised that sound. You must have had a nightmare...and it didn’t sound like you were calming down much. 

“Y/n?...can I come in?” a child-like voice asked from the other side of your door.  

You recognised that voice. You had heard it every now and again. It was unsettling at first but you had grown used to it, it was just little Brahms. Your new normal. 

Honestly though, you were too shaken to even process what was going on. “Mhm...yeah...” you answered, running your hands through your hair and trying to collect yourself.

Brahms smiled at your answer before quietly opening the door, stepping inside and closing it behind him.

The room was dimly lit, the moonlight seeping in through the curtains being the only light source. So, a tall figure of a man standing in your room when you were certain that you lived alone should have been more unsettling than it was.

Instead of reacting appropriately, you just looked at him with an expression of desperation. He moved closer, surprised when you reached a hand out for him. Your eyes were hazy and teary.

It seemed that you hadn’t fully woken up from your nightmare. Half asleep, which was probably why you weren’t reacting like he expected you too. Instead you were encouraging him to come closer. 

So, he did. 

Once you fully woke up, you would probably come to your senses and panic a little but right now you needed comforting so he was going to focus on that. He didn’t like seeing you so upset, not at all.

Approaching the bed, Brahms climbed on beside you, cautiously wrapping an arm around your shoulders. Without even thinking, you threw your arms around his waist, clinging to him as you cried into his shoulder.

“Y/n...” there was the voice of little Brahms again, the familiar voice putting you at ease. Maybe that was why you reacted so well, or didn’t react at all, you recognised the voice and that meant you weren’t scared of him. 

He was glad about that but...the voice didn’t feel right for this. He wanted to comfort you, to let you know that he was here for you, that you could rely on him when you were scared and upset.

“Y/n...” he repeated, his voice deeper this time, older, real.

Still, it didn’t make you panic, it only made you cling tighter to him.

“It’s okay, Y/n. I’m here now and I won’t leave you” he wrapped his arm around you a little tighter, using his other hand to stroke your hair. “It was just a bad dream, it wasn’t real. Everything is going to be okay” he continued to soothe you as your crying stopped and your breathing evened out. 

The change of voice was a little startling but it was pleasant, even comforting. While you had grown used to the childish voice, this one made you feel safe, you liked it.

Somewhere in the back of your mind, you pieced together the clues. Things moving around when you left the room, the sounds and voices, the man that was currently holding you. This was Brahms, your Brahms, not someone what you should be afraid of.

Your hold on him loosened, your body relaxing, but you didn’t pull away. Brahms looked down at you, smiling to himself when he saw that you had fallen back to sleep. That was fast...you really must have been only half awake.

Brahms knew that when you woke up tomorrow, you would likely have a different reaction to him being here but that was something to worry about tomorrow. For now, he was just enjoying that he was finally holding you, finally touching you. Now you knew about him, he wouldn’t have to hide. He didn’t expect everything to be like nothing happened, but he was confident that you would accept him.

[qqueenofhades]

Re: the post you reblogged about Bush. I'm 21 and tbh feel like I can only vote for Bernie, can you explain if/why I shouldn't? Thanks and sorry if this is dumb or anything.

Oh boy. Okay, I’ll do my best here. Note that a) this will get long, and b) I’m old, Tired, and I‘m pretty sure my brain tried to kill me last night. Since by nature I am sure I will say something Controversial ™, if anyone reads this and feels a deep urge to inform me that I am Wrong, just… mark it down as me being Wrong and move on with your life. But also, really, you should read this and hopefully think about it. Because while I’m glad you asked this question, it feels like there’s a lot in your cohort who won’t, and that worries me. A lot.

First, not to sound utterly old-woman-in-a-rocking-chair ancient, people who came of age/are only old enough to have Obama be the first president that they really remember have no idea how good they had it. The world was falling the fuck apart in 2008 (not coincidentally, after 8 years of Bush). We came within a flicker of the permanent collapse of the global economy. The War on Terror was in full roar, the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan were at their height, we had Dick Cheney as the cartoon supervillain before we had any of Trump’s cohort, and this was before Chelsea Manning or Edward Snowden had exposed the extent of NSA/CIA intelligence-gathering/American excesses or there was any kind of public debate around the fact that we were all surveilled all the time. And the fact that a brown guy named Barack Hussein Obama was elected in this climate seems, and still seems tbh, kind of amazing. And Obama was certainly not a Perfect President ™. He had to scale back a lot of planned initiatives, he is notorious for expanding the drone strike/extrajudicial assassination program, he still subscribed to the overall principles of neoliberalism and American exceptionalism, etc etc. There is valid criticism to be made as to how the hopey-changey optimistic rhetoric stacked up against the hard realities of political office. And yet…. at this point, given what we’re seeing from the White House on a daily basis, the depth of the parallel universe/double standards is absurd.

Because here’s the thing. Obama, his entire family, and his entire administration had to be personally/ethically flawless the whole time (and they managed that – not one scandal or arrest in eight years, against the legions of Trumpistas now being convicted) because of the absolute frothing depths of Republican hatred, racial conspiracy theories, and obstruction against him. (Remember Merrick Garland and how Mitch McConnell got away with that, and now we have Gorsuch and Kavanaugh on the Supreme Court? Because I remember that). If Obama had pulled one-tenth of the shit, one-twentieth of the shit that the Trump administration does every day, he would be gone. It also meant that people who only remember Obama think he was typical for an American president, and he wasn’t. Since about… Jimmy Carter, and definitely since Ronald Reagan, the American people have gone for the Trump model a lot more than the Obama model. Whatever your opinion on his politics or character, Obama was a constitutional law professor, a community activist, a neighborhood organizer and brilliant Ivy League intellectual who used to randomly lie awake at night thinking about income inequality. Americans don’t value intellectualism in their politicians; they just don’t. They don’t like thinking that “the elites” are smarter than them. They like the folksy populist who seems fun to have a beer with, and Reagan/Bush Senior/Clinton/Bush Junior sold this persona as hard as they possibly could. As noted in said post, Bush Junior (or Shrub as the late, great Molly Ivins memorably dubbed him) was Trump Lite but from a long-established political family who could operate like an outwardly civilized human.

The point is: when you think Obama was relatively normal (which, again, he wasn’t, for any number of reasons) and not the outlier in a much larger pattern of catastrophic damage that has been accelerated since, again, the 1980s (oh Ronnie Raygun, how you lastingly fucked us!), you miss the overall context in which this, and which Trump, happened. Like most left-wingers, I don’t agree with Obama’s recent and baffling decision to insert himself into the 2020 race and warn the Democratic candidates against being too progressive or whatever he was on about. I think he was giving into the same fear that appears to be motivating the remaining chunk of Joe Biden’s support: that middle/working-class white America won’t go for anything too wild or that might sniff of Socialism, and that Uncle Joe, recalled fondly as said folksy populist and the internet’s favorite meme grandfather from his time as VP, could pick up the votes that went to Trump last time. And that by nature, no one else can.

The underlying belief is that these white voters just can’t support anything too “un-American,” and that by pushing too hard left, Democratic candidates risk handing Trump a second term. Again: I don’t agree and I think he was mistaken in saying it. But I also can’t say that Obama of all people doesn’t know exactly the strength of the political machine operating against the Democratic Party and the progressive agenda as a whole, because he ran headfirst into it for eight years. The fact that he managed to pass any of his legislative agenda, usually before the Tea Party became a thing in 2010, is because Democrats controlled the House and Senate for the first two years of his first term. He was not perfect, but it was clear that he really did care (just look up the pictures of him with kids). He installed smart, efficient, and scandal-free people to do jobs they were qualified for. He gave us Elena Kagan and Sonia Sotomayor to join RBG on the Supreme Court. All of this seems… like a dream.

That said: here we are in a place where Biden, Bernie Sanders, and Elizabeth Warren are the front-runners for the Democratic nomination (and apparently Pete Buttigieg is getting some airplay as a dark horse candidate, which… whatever). The appeal of Biden is discussed above, and he sure as hell is not my favored candidate (frankly, I wish he’d just quit). But Sanders and Warren are 85% - 95% similar in their policy platforms. The fact that Michael “50 Billion Dollar Fortune” Bloomberg started rattling his chains about running for president is because either a Sanders or Warren presidency terrifies the outrageously exploitative billionaire capitalist oligarchy that runs this country and has been allowed to proceed essentially however the fuck they like since… you guessed it, the 1980s, the era of voodoo economics, deregulation, and the free market above all. Warren just happens to be ten years younger than Sanders and female, and Sanders’ age is not insignificant. He’s 80 years old and just had a heart attack, and there’s still a year to go to the election. It’s also more than a little eye-rolling to describe him as the only progressive candidate in the race, when he’s an old white man (however much we like and approve of his policy positions). And here’s the thing, which I think is a big part of the reason why this polarized ideological purity internet leftist culture mistrusts Warren:

She may have changed her mind on things in the past.

Scary, right? I sound like I’m being facetious, but I’m not. An argument I had to read with my own two eyes on this godforsaken hellsite was that since Warren became a Democrat around the time Clinton signed Don’t Ask Don’t Tell, she sekritly hated gay people and might still be a corporate sellout, so on and etcetera. (And don’t even get me STARTED on the fact that DADT, coming a few years after the height of the AIDS crisis which was considered God’s Judgment of the Icky Gays, was the best Clinton could realistically hope to achieve, but this smacks of White Gay Syndrome anyway and that is a whole other kettle of fish.) Bernie has always demonstrably been a democratic socialist, and: good for him. I’m serious. But because there’s the chance that Warren might not have thought exactly as she does now at any point in her life, the hysterical and paranoid left-wing elements don’t trust that she might not still secretly do so. (Zomgz!) It’s the same element that’s feeding cancel culture and “wokeness.” Nobody can be allowed to have shifted or grown in their opinions or, like a functional, thoughtful, non-insane adult, changed their beliefs when presented with compelling evidence to the contrary. To the ideological hordes, any hint of uncertainty or past failure to completely toe the line is tantamount to heresy. Any evidence of any other belief except The Correct One means that this person is functionally as bad as Trump. And frankly, it’s only the Sanders supporters who, just as in 2016, are threatening to withhold their vote in the general election if their preferred candidate doesn’t win the primary, and indeed seem weirdly proud about it.

OK, boomer Bernie or Buster.

Here’s the thing, the thing, the thing: there is never going to be an American president free of the deeply toxic elements of American ideology. There just won’t be. This country has been built how it has for 250 years, and it’s not gonna change. You are never going to have, at least not in the current system, some dream candidate who gets up there and parrots the left-wing talking points and attacks American imperialism, exceptionalism, ravaging global capitalism, military and oil addiction, etc. They want to be elected as leader of a country that has deeply internalized and taken these things to heart for its entire existence, and most of them believe it to some degree themselves. So this groupthink white liberal mentality where the only acceptable candidate is this Perfect Non-Problematic robot who has only ever had one belief their entire lives and has never ever wavered in their devotion to doctrine has really gotten bad. The Democratic Party would be considered… maybe center/mild left in most other developed countries. It’s not even really left-wing by general standards, and Sanders and Warren are the only two candidates for the nomination who are even willing to go there and explicitly put out policy proposals that challenge the systematic structure of power, oppression, and exploitation of the late-stage capitalist 21st century. Warren has the billionaires fussed, and instead of backing down, she’s doubling down. That’s part of why they’re so scared of her. (And also misogyny, because the world is depressing like that.) She is going head-on after picking a fight with some of the worst people on the planet, who are actively killing the rest of us, and I don’t know about you, but I like that.

Of course: none of this will mean squat if she (or the eventual Democratic winner, who I will vote for regardless of who it is, but as you can probably tell, she’s my ride or die) don’t a) win the White House and then do as they promised on the campaign trail, and b) don’t have a Democratic House and Senate willing to have a backbone and pass the laws. Even Nancy Pelosi, much as she’s otherwise a badass, held off on opening a formal impeachment inquiry into Trump for months out of fear it would benefit him, until the Ukraine thing fell into everyone’s laps. The Democrats are really horrible at sticking together and voting the party line the way Republicans do consistently, because Democrats are big-tent people who like to think of themselves as accepting and tolerant of other views and unwilling to force their members’ hands. The Republicans have no such qualms (and indeed, judging by their enabling of Trump, have no qualms at all). 

The modern American Republican party has become a vehicle for no-holds-barred power for rich white men at the expense of absolutely everything and everyone else, and if your rationale is that you can’t vote for the person opposing Donald Goddamn Trump is that you’re just not vibing with them on the language of that one policy proposal… well, I’m glad that you, White Middle Class Liberal, feel relatively safe that the consequences of that decision won’t affect you personally. Even if we’re due to be out of the Paris Climate Accords one day after the 2020 election, and the issue of climate change now has the most visibility it’s ever had after years of big-business, Republican-led efforts to deny and discredit the science, hey, Secret Corporate Shill, am I right? Can’t trust ‘er. Let’s go have a craft beer.

As has been said before: vote as far left as you want in the primary. Vote your ideology, vote whatever candidate you want, because the only way to make actual, real-world change is to do that. The huge, embedded, all-consuming and horrible system in which we operate is not just going to suddenly be run by fairy dust and happy thoughts overnight. Select candidates that reflect your values exactly, be as picky and ideologically militant as you want. That’s the time to do that! Then when it comes to the general election:

America is a two-party system. It sucks, but that’s the case. Third-party votes, or refraining from voting because “it doesn’t matter” are functionally useless at best and actively harmful at worst.

Either the Democratic candidate or Donald Trump will win the 2020 election.

There is absolutely no length that the Republican/GOP machine, and its malevolent allies elsewhere, will not go to in order to secure a Trump victory. None.

Any talk whatsoever about “progressive values” or any kind of liberal activism, coupled with a course of action that increases the possibility of a Trump victory, is hypocritical at best and actively malicious at worst.

This is why I found the Democratic response to Obama’s “don’t go too wild” comments interesting. Bernie doubled down on the fact that his plans have widespread public support, and he’s right. (Frankly, the fact that Sanders and Warren are polling at the top, and the fact that they’re politicians and would not be crafting these campaign messages if they didn’t know that they were being positively received, says plenty on its own). Warren cleverly highlighted and praised Obama’s accomplishments in office (i.e. the Affordable Care Act) and didn’t say squat about whether she agreed or disagreed with him, then went right back to campaigning about why billionaires suck. And some guy named Julian Castro basically blew Obama off and claimed that “any Democrat” could beat Trump in 2020, just by nature of existing and being non-insane.

This is very dangerous! Do not be Julian Castro!

As I said in my tags on the Bush post: everyone assumed that sensible people would vote for Kerry in 2004. Guess what happened? Yeah, he got Swift Boated. The race between Obama and McCain in 2008, even after those said nightmare years of Bush, was very close until the global crash broke it open in Obama’s favor, and Sarah Palin was an actual disqualifier for a politician being brazenly incompetent and unprepared. (Then again, she was a woman from a remote backwater state, not a billionaire businessman.) In 2012, we thought Corporate MormonBot Mitt Fuggin’ Romney was somehow the worst and most dangerous candidate the Republicans could offer. In 2016, up until Election Day itself, everyone assumed that HRC was a badly flawed candidate but would win anyway. And… we saw how that worked out. Complacency is literally deadly.

I was born when Reagan was still president. I’m just old enough to remember the efforts to impeach Clinton over forcing an intern to give him a BJ in the Oval Office (This led by the same Republicans making Donald Trump into a darling of the evangelical Christian right wing.) I’m definitely old enough to remember 9/11 and how America lost its mind after that, and I remember the Bush years. And, obviously, the contrast with Obama, the swing back toward Trump, and everything that has happened since. We can’t afford to do this again. We’re hanging by a thread as it is, and not just America, but the entire planet.

So yes. By all means, vote for Sanders in the primary. Then when November 3, 2020 rolls around, if you care about literally any of this at all, hold your nose if necessary and vote straight-ticket Democrat, from the president, to the House and Senate, to the state and local offices. I cannot put it more strongly than that.

[unspeakable3]

15 questions | 15 people

thanks so much for the tags @constitutionalweasleymonarchy @mundrakan @anemicc-royalty !!

1. are you named after anyone? it was once claimed that my dad named be after a russian ~erotic model~ but idk if that's true and tbh i'd rather not find out 😶

2. when was the last time you cried? about half an hour ago lmfao. happy sappy tears!!

3. do you have kids? no

4. do you use sarcasm a lot? i'm british

5. what’s the first thing you notice about people? i used to think it was hair, bc hair/facial hair is usually the only way i can identify people (do NOT talk to me about the time my ex cut his hair off) but it actually takes me like 3-4 times meeting someone to remember even that so. vibes. vibes are all i have to go on.

6. what’s your eye colour? brown

7. scary movies or happy ending? SCARY SCARY ALWAYS SCARY!!! i bloody love horror films. i like comedy-horror and so-bad-it's-good horror and gives-you-nightmares-for-months horror and those weird experimental 60s/70s horror films and i have a spreadsheet of like 150 horror films by decade that i want to watch and i work through them every october and it's my favourite tradition thank u

8. any special talents? er. a hairdresser once told me that my hair is like a duck's back? in that water just slides off it and it takes fucking ages to get wet enough to wash?

9. where were you born? english/welsh border grimzone

10. what are your hobbies? writing, reading, crafty needle-based things (currently: sewing a pair of mad pyjamas; i also like knitting [badly] + embroidery), gardening, vintage shopping, learning languages (currently: ancient greek [intermediate], british sign language [beginning of beginner]), lego (currently: the delorean!!!) and also going to the cinema and eating out at restaurants and all that sort of thing (@constitutionalweasleymonarchy i think we are kindred spirits i could've just kept yours 💛)

11. do you have any pets? I WISH

12. what sports do you play/have you played? i used to play netball and hockey at school but i'm not really a team player so.

13. how tall are you? just short of 5ft4

14. favourite subject at school? history + art + french + english literature

15. dream job? you know how like in The Past you'd get wealthy benefactors sponsoring the favourite pets people to just like, lounge about writing/painting/whatevering? yeah, that.

i'm sure everyone has already been tagged but if you have not and you would like to do this CONSIDER THIS ME TAGGING YOU! 💛

[out-of-this-dimension]

Hypothetically Rewriting Assault’s Story + Some General Assault Opinions

There’s a game my husband and I like to play when we watch a movie, play a game, or read a book that has a story that we don’t really enjoy or we enjoy certain parts of but not others.  We look at things we’d keep and things we’d change and we build a story from there-- sort of like an AU but we don’t really go into the writing part, we just stick to theorizing and mapping a general story.

I decided to play that game with Star Fox.  Not because I think Star Fox has a bad story but because sometimes I think the stories could have been handled better.  Note: for the rewrite game, I only really look at story, even for video games, I don’t really look at gameplay mechanics, but I do understand those have a lot to do with story potential so I do take it in as a factor... I just don’t bother to “rewrite” the mechanics, if that makes any sense at all.  Some of my list today will include boss encounters but I wouldn’t necessarily say those are mechanic-related... more like “event-related”.

I’ve mused a bit in the past about rewriting Adventures and Command and I do have plans to do a mock up of an Adventures remake eventually.  However, today I was thinking about how I would go about handling an Assault re-write in particular.  Much like Command and Adventures, I don’t have any beef with the core story but I do think there’s a few things that could’ve been better about Assault’s storyline-- like they had good ideas rolling but they didn’t quite refine them.

Under the cut because SUPER long.

My basic feelings on Assault are pretty positive.  I think the game is generally just fun and I like that it feels like the natural progression from SF64.  I liked getting to see planets we haven’t seen since the N64 era in better graphics and I liked seeing Star Wolf return.  I also just thought the aparoids were neat enemies. 

Generally speaking, though, when it comes to Assault, I think it suffers from the thing it tries to push the most-- the story.  I think a lot of people get caught up in thinking the story is better than it is because it’s the first game since SF64 that really follows the same Star Fox vibe without retelling the Lylat Wars.  Don’t get me wrong, the overall plot is great but the execution and pacing are... wonky.  Certain characterizations also take a hit in some regards but no one really talks about that when Command exists. That’s something we’ll talk about later on with this post.

That being said, Assault really does have a lot good going for it.  An absolute banger of a soundtrack, some great dialogue, a neat story synopsis, the introduction of cool characters like Panther and Beltino (who existed but was always off-screen), and just good levels.  

So, here’s what I would add, I suppose, if I were to somehow have the ability to rewrite Assault.  Originally I had this in paragraph form, but I’ve made it into more of a list under topic segments with main points bolded for your viewing pleasure.  Some of these points might be considered nitpicky and while I do understand that yes, this is a game about space animals, I do hold the developers in high enough regard to make a game with a continuity that makes sense.

The Story Changes

- Reduce Pigma’s storyline in Assault.  This is the biggest one for me because a bulk of the plotline feels like a giant chase to just get at Pigma and it feels like it derails from the actual plot with the aparoids.  We only go to Sargasso because of Pigma.  We only go to Fichina and then back to Meteo again, because of Pigma.  That’s 3 levels in a 10 level game devoted to just tracking down Pigma and chasing him.  While it makes the build up to fighting Pigma kind of nice, I personally feel like the plot could be reduced to 2 levels.  If Assault overall was a longer game, I could see them making it 3 levels.  Overall, though, in its current state, I feel like the side plot overstays its welcome and the aparoids promptly get shoved to the side in favor of “Oh no, we gotta get to Pigma!” And I get the main motive here is to show how the aparoids affect people and because of the build up, it does a good job at showing how utterly terrifying the aparoids are.  But it’s still too long given the length of Assault’s story. The only alternative to this is make Assault longer, which... honestly, it should be.  

- Revise the scene with Tricky.  I’m obviously not well-versed in dinosaur biology but I’m pretty sure dinos didn’t grow that fast from what studying I HAVE done.  And why is he suddenly king now?  Did his parents die?  He seems not affected by this at all?  Like it’s a funny scene with him, Fox, and Krystal, but it’s odd if you really look at it.  Give us, as players, more context because I’m still not even sure what happened to make Tricky suddenly the leader and... big.  As a note, you’re gonna hear me gripe a lot about the Sauria level in this post.

- The Star Wolf + Peppy sacrifice is a low effort way to raise tension/stakes and then cop out.  Oldest trick in the book, imo, is to act like you’re going to kill off important characters only for them to be alive miraculously.  And let’s face it, as an audience we all know they aren’t going to kill those characters because it’s Nintendo and those characters are too beloved.  I would’ve forgiven them for only doing this with Peppy or Star Wolf, but when you tack them both together and throw in the fact they make it seem like you’re going to have to kill General Pepper too... yeah, it’s just a bit much of the same trope over and over again.  I wanted to put a note in here about how I’m fine with the Great Fox being “sacrificed” but overall, it needed to return to the series because of it’s icon status, but I think that’s more of a gripe at Command instead of Assault.

- Keep Pigma alive.  This will conflict with a point I have later on about the game consistently having characters cheat death for easy drama points but with Pigma, I would’ve kept him fully alive... but maybe with some physical damage from the aparoids.  I understand he’s semi-alive in Command and tbh I don’t know where I stand on that.  Why keep Pigma alive, you might ask?  I feel like his character has a lot more potential than being “just the greedy guy”.  Like he’s got good potential future villain material for future games and... if I’m honest?  I just don’t see Nintendo wanting to keep Pigma dead so why even bother killing him off?  They couldn’t even commit to him being dead in Command anyways so it seems very moot.

- Bring Bill and Katt back.  Assault is acts a bit like a big reunion of all of our SF64 favorites but our two favorite side characters are suspiciously missing.  Wouldn’t Bill be out on the front lines fighting against Andrew in the beginning?  Or maybe back in Katina?  And wouldn’t Katt inevitably show up in the midst of the invasion, maybe to pointedly check in on Falco?

- Bring Andrew back for the final fight. I think Andrew being defeated early into the game is fine overall but I think bringing him back in for a reunion final fight against the aparoids would serve to really solidify that it’s really everyone vs the invading aparoid force.  It would show that not only is Star Wolf willing to put aside their differences but so is basically everyone in the Lylat System in the name of survival.  Imagine the Venomians and Cornerians working together against an aparoid fleet, giving Star Fox and Star Wolf time to attack the queen?  I just think it’d be neat and it’d open up the potential for some fun banter mid-mission.  I do understand that quite a few people consider Andrew canonically dead after Assault but personally, I feel that his defeat left his fate questionable (I’m a staunch believer that unless there’s a body, they’re probably alive, especially for Nintendo games because, again, they never like to kill people off) so him returning in Command never really bothered me.  

- In general, reconsider some of the character portrayals.  Unfortunately, when a series has a different studio for each game, character portrayals will inevitably have inconsistencies.  While I give Namco a lot of credit for putting in oodles and oodles of detail into the game (particularly the levels), I think they failed in their portrayal of Fox, at the least, and Wolf is a considerable offender as well.  While it’s obvious that Fox in Adventures was effectively modeled off of Sabre even in terms of personality, Rareware was at least able to justify Fox’s newfound jaded attitude with the passing of many years and a distinct lack of steady income, resulting in the team being in disarray.  Assault’s Fox is a stark contrast to his cynical interpretation with seemingly no explanation other than maybe “Oh, I have more money and a gf, maybe I should behave myself”.  As if the sudden change in personality wasn’t random, Fox also just seems very blah, like a blank slate stereotypical shooter game protagonist dude with little to no emotion.  Wolf is less obvious but gets slated into a mentor-like role midway through the game and ends up in a respectful rivalry with Fox... which there’s nothing inherently wrong with that except for it happening abruptly (and, I mean, Peppy is right there).  But I take less issue with this and more of an issue with the fact that there’s an entire level establishing that Wolf now runs a crime den with effectively what seems to be an army and no one bats an eye at this.  He doesn’t even call on them to help with the aparoids.  Did they all die when the aparoids attacked Meteo?  Are they safe somewhere else?  Where do they go?  How was Sargasso able to operate without the CDF being on their doorstep with warrants for arrests?

- Don’t kill all the dinosaurs.  A bit of a dramatic statement but the ending screen that showed all the damage to Sauria really bothered me.  While I understand that the dinosaurs had less of a chance against the aparoids than a more technology-focused society like Corneria, I was a bit disappointed that the decision was made to just state that a lot of tribes had been wiped out.  I know this could easily be retconned in a future game and I feel like it should be.  “But why, Amalia?  Why are you disappointed by that?”  1) It’s a little too grimdark for my tastes.  2) The fact it all happened off-screen felt very hand-wavy.  And 3) It brings into question the entire point of Adventures.  Why did we bother to save this planet if it was going to be reduced to rubble and ash 1 year later?  Where were the Krazoa in all of this?  Why did they not make an appearance at all to try to stop the invasion with their alleged powers?  It just raises too many weird questions and I feel like Namco didn’t think it through too much.  Which I mean, sure.  Family, kiddo game.  I’m not asking for bigbrain plot and lore but I’m squinting at this bit because it does feel very contrary to the lore from the previous game.

- Make the aparoids more relevant.  As nice as it is to have a random bad guy from another galaxy, I feel like there was more that could be done with the aparoids in terms of their origins.  Tiny things, mind you, not huge revelations.  Off the top of my head, they could have been tied into Krystal’s backstory to help alleviate some of the complaints that she was too random to be added to the series’ main cast.  Alternatively, they could have been a product of Andross or even a weapon prototype from Corneria that fled the lab (I actually thought the game was leaning in that direction for a bit then just Nothing Happened).  I get that the vagueness of their origins leaves room for people to speculate and speculation is nice but... when you leave too many things unknown, it starts to feel less like giving fans room to interpret and more like just doing random things for the sake of it.  I think a lore tidbit here or there would work wonders for the aparoids instead of leaving them as just borg/zerg clones.

Level-Based Changes

- Add either Aparoid RedEye or Aparoid General Scales as a boss to Sauria.  Given that this level mysteriously lacks a boss, which is just weird compared to the other levels, I think that they had the opportunity to add something cool to go along with the cinematic feel they were going for with Assault.  Assault’s cutscenes do play in a movie-like fashion and it’s clear they’re trying to make the game as epic as possible.  It’s a shame they had so much fodder for a great boss here but they failed to go through with it.  Alternatively: Add a Krazoa-Aparoid fusion.  Why?  Because Star Fox is about cool epic sci-fi and that would be cool epic sci-fi incarnate.

- Add a boss to the Aparoid Homeworld Level, aka the penultimate level.  Another one I felt was personally weird that there was no “final defense system” to challenge the team.  Would be cool to do an aerial battle over the aparoid planet with some giant flying aparoid.

- Be kinder to Sauria.  The level had some good homages but overall was incredibly small and incredibly short.  It felt like a bone tossed to Adventures fans but was not entirely true to the setting built by Rareware.  I’m... not even sure where the Sauria level is supposed to take place?  I presume it’s Walled City but it doesn’t really have the same color scheme or aesthetic?  Also where is my revised Adventures music?  Why do all the other levels get it but Sauria doesn’t? 

- Put some of those funky items from the multiplayer into the main campaign.  I don’t know why some of these things, items especially, were omitted unless it was purely due to time constraints.  I remember having missile launchers and jetpacks in the multiplayer and was a bit sad that they were not in the main campaign.  Retuning the levels and adding those in would be a nice breath of fresh air for the more tedious on-foot missions.

- More levels.  Self-explanatory.  Still sad we didn’t get the Zoness or Titania levels in the single-player mode.  

I think all of the above changes would improve the game, though I recognize all of this is being said 16 years later after lots of time to contemplate Assault’s weaker points.  I’m not entirely certain how long Star Fox Assault took to develop but given that there’s obviously quite a bit scrapped from the game (an entire arcade mode was scrapped as well), I’m going to assume that the studio felt pressured to shove the game out the door and into the hands of customers.  It’s a shame, really, because I think a little bit longer in the oven would have done a lot of good.  Still, the product we got was good in its own right and a game that many people look back on fondly.  I haven’t gotten to replay it in years but I hope to quite soon.

You might wonder why I bothered typing this all out and I guess my point was this-- Assault was great but it wasn’t perfect, and while a lot of other games fall under a crushing amount of scrutiny, Assault seems to dodge it.  And don’t get me wrong-- I adore Assault.  But given that not many takes exist out there about rewriting it, I decided to give it a shot.  For variety’s sake.  

I do want to a mock up of a revised Assault story, which I think I will get to work on after completing this while all my ideas are still fresh in mind.  So stay tuned for that sometime in the near future.  I will also be doing my Adventures mock up at some point but probably not for a little bit as I do wanna focus some of my free time on actual fic-writing.

Anyways, if you stuck around this long, thank you for reading!  Have any changes you’d like to see to Assault if you could time machine your way back to the early 2000s?  Feel free to post in the comments, I’d love to read your ideas!

[cherrycheolliesc]

Let Me Hear You Say

part 46: Joshua’s Weeb Closet. (46/50)

red below 👇 (1.5k words)

“You know I can break out of this, right?” you say to Mingyu who is currently holding you down. He just scoffs knowing you can't move anywhere, but entertains you, “I know, it just makes me feel strong”

“You already strong, Gyu. Anyways where is everyone?” Seokmin asks. You look around the room only seeing half of your friends in Seungcheol’s small living room. Seungkwan and Wonwoo are sitting on the couch quietly talking. You wonder how they became friends because you've never seen them talk to each other. You assume Jeonghan and Joshua are probably somewhere making out so they don't have to deal with actually setting up the party. Seungcheol and Jihoon seem to be lecturing Chan about who knows what. Things are finally quieting down when everyone decides to watch the movie that's playing until someone bursts through the doors, “I'm here motherfuckers. The party is finally getting started”

“She drunk, isn't she,” Cheol asks as he points towards the small blonde girl in Mina’s arms. Seoyeon nods as she brings Chaeyoung to one of the rooms in the apartment. When she comes back, everyone turns towards the commotion at the front door. “You can't make me go inside. I'll bite you, you know I will” 

“Soonyoung, if you just go inside, it'll make everything so much easier,” Jun says as he continues to try and push the smaller boy in. Everyone just watches him, Minghao, and Vernon struggle to bring Soonyoung in until Cheol eventually just picks him up and holds him down, “You two are gonna talk like two grown adults or I’m firing Jihoon”

“Woah why am I getting involved in this?” Jihoon asks walking over to the rest of the group. Everyone looks confused before Chan talks, “How can you even fire him?” 

“Yea and with what job exactly,” Soonyoung says causing Cheol to roll his eyes, “Look if guys talk to each other, I'll tell you where I work” 

“One, no one cares. Two, stop lying to yourself, it's okay if you're unemployed. We won't stop loving you just because you don't have a job, Cheollie” you say which only annoys him more. Jihoon confused asks, “Why do you guys really believe he's unemployed? The dude is literally our boss.”

“ ‘Our’ boss?” Seungkwan says, “yes our boss. He's at the building all the time. How did you not know that?”

“To be honest I thought he was just going there to hook up with you, Ji,” Jeonghan says before getting a drink. “Ew, why would I hook up with Cheol? He's like my brother. That would just ruin your friendship.”

“And that is exactly why I’m not admitting my feelings for Y/n!” Soonyoung screams before trying to run away but failing as Cheol is still holding him down. You decide yelling back is the best option, “like I would ever admit my feelings for you.” 

“That’s it! Time out for you two until you can figure out your issues. Bring them to Shua’s weeb closet and don’t let them out until they're cool with each other.” Cheol says before lifting Soonyoung. Mingyu sees the message Cheol sends and brings you to Joshua’s room as well. “Hey hey, why are you taking them to my closet? What if they fuck in there?”

“Then they'll be happy again,” Vernon says with a smile on his face. Shua rolls his eyes before giving in. Eventually, you and Soonyoung are both shoved into the small closet. You try to stay as far as you can from him, putting a blowup titan in between the two of you. To ease the awkwardness after a few minutes of silence, Soonyoung asks, “You think Shua uses this thing as a sex doll?”

“If he does, I regret touching it,” you reply. The boy beside you laughs and says, “If I remember correctly, you and Joshua sleeping together for a whole two years after college, right?” 

“Yeah well, it was kinda weird. Let's just say, you aren't the only furry in our friend group.” This makes him laugh again before finding a place to sit down. You take a seat beside him as he leans his head on your shoulder, “I’m sorry, Y/n.”

“For what exactly, Soonie?” You ask back wanting a better explanation than just a small sorry. He rolls his eyes before saying, “You already know why. For being immature and not dealing with things like an adult.”

“To be honest, none of us deal with things like adults. We're just the worst. I guess I’m sorry too.” you say back to him. The two sit comfortably in silence just relaxing in each other’s company. Why did we make things so hard for no reason? you wonder. That thought quickly goes away when you remember that the two of you are friends and you never want to ruin that, but your thoughts are interrupted, “I love you, Y/n. But I mean even if it's pretty obvious, I know I'm not very good at showing it.” 

“But we're friends, Soon,” you say back before walking to the other side of the closet. You glance at his face for a second and see a bit of hurt in his eyes. Why am I still hiding how I feel? What’s the point of lying to myself and everyone else? You ask yourself before he breaks your thoughts once again, “Y/n, you say that, but then you're willing to fight with me for months because of the whole situation. Why are we just continuing to do this to each other?” 

“I don't know, Soon. I really don't know,” you reply, overwhelmed, burying your face into your hands. He walks behind you and gives one of his famous, familiar back hugs to comfort you. You relax into the hug as he softly kisses your shoulder, “it's okay, Y/n. You don't need to have an answer right now. It's not wrong to want to take everything at your own pace. I just don't want to feel like I have to constantly avoid you because like you said, you are my best friend.“

“Are you trying to say ‘the power of friendship is so strong’ that we can get through things like this?” you sarcastically say as you laugh and lean into his arms. He giggles and replies, “That's exactly what I’m saying.” The two of you once again sit in silence. You take in everything from the moment you first saw Soonyoung as a small boy eating dirt in the playground to this exact moment You wonder when everything changed, “When did you realize you loved me, Soon?” 

“There isn't an exact moment. I think just over time my love constantly grew for you. I didn't realize it at first and never really wanted to accept it because, well I'm pretty sure it's obvious why,” he responds. You feel the same way. You've always just told yourself it was because of that dance, but you know those feelings have always been there. More importantly, you know you've acted on those feelings before. “Why did you leave me after graduation? After I told you I love you?” 

“Because I was stupid and a coward. I got jealous of Joshua, but then I started to think I wasn't as good as him. I wouldn't be good enough like him. I thought I wouldn't be able to make you happy like he would, ” he says honestly. You don't understand how he could ever think he wasn't good enough. You loved everything about the kid, from his weird tiger obsession to his incredible dance skills. “Soonie, you know I never believed you weren't good enough. And to be honest, Shua wasn't the greatest boyfriend. He was an amazing friend, but there's something off about knowing your boyfriend is denying his feelings for someone else”

“I guess that's how Seoyeon felt. It was just seeing you in the arms of a model like him brought up my insecurities I guess. I thought it would be too hard to compete. So I ran away because I didn't want to deal with the feelings, ” he explains still holding you in his arms. You feel how much bigger his arms got over the years and decide to ask him another question, “When did you start working out? Not that I'm complaining, but the last time Cheol asked you to work out with him you called him a loser and told him there's no reason to work out when you have a cute face.”

“Yes, my face is adorable, but I figured I'd just work out because why not. Also, Ji paid for a year's gym membership in China by accident,” he answers while softly laughing. The two of you continue to talk about random things for the next few hours without anyone interrupting you. You hear soft snoring on the other side of the door. Soonyoung quietly opens the door to not wake the sleeping person on the other side. You walk out to see Seungcheol and Wonwoo fast asleep on each other and quickly take a photo before sneaking away. You and Soonyoung decide to leave through the window to avoid questions or stares from anyone else. For the rest of the night, the two of you wonder who knows where and finally you feel happy to be with your best friend for once.

previous / masterlist / next

↣ summary: after not seeing each other for years, Yn is ecstatic when she finds out all of her friends will finally be in the same place at one time. but unfortunately an unwanted dream turns a 12 year friendship into hateful relationship between yn and soonyoung.

↣ pairing: reader x soonyoung.

↣ genre: angst, comedy, youtube au, sm au. friends to enemies to lovers.

just message me or dm me if you wanted to be added to a tag list.

tag list: @agustmonoworld @multinines--xx @noniesgirl @svtslvt @binniebutter @fluffyhyeju @happyvitamin @liarspoetry @itsdnguyenxoxo @monstathedisco @mimaisiomai @sensorivm @sunshineshouchan @hoerangdan @lovingyu04 @linhyyboo12 @youdawonu @ash-moon8 @twitterpated-by-you @hao-are-xu @onefinecarat @kwonthefics @datte-bae-yo @gabagaba05 @all-i-needislovee @smolchild95 @pooofthechicken @simplewonderland @starrysungie @yanniezx @woohannie @serenadesvt @minghaofilm @velve-tae @ahnneyong @sherizaraiyah Unable to tag @manamiyx

a/n- tbh i don’t really know how i feel abt this chapter. but also i don’t really see myself as a good writer when it comes to like written things like this but i really want to get better because i want to open requests soon when i get the time.

[bluesylveon2]

My My, I Could Never Let You Go

Summary: Sasha Zoe just wants her dad to walk her down the aisle. There is only one problem: she doesn't know which one is her father. What could possibly go wrong?

Pairings: Levi x Hange, Sasha x Niccolo, and other background relationships

Disclaimer: This is a Levihan Mamma Mia au. This fanfic is inspired by Mamma Mia which is directed by Phyllida Loyd, written by Catherine Johnson, and uses music from the pop group ABBA. Attack on Titan is a manga/anime series written by Hajime Isayama and published by Kondasha

Author’s Note: Happy Valentine's Day! This chapter focuses more on Sasha's friends (more of a Galentine's tbh). I did add some scenes from the movie, but you'll find it towards the end. This is the last chapter where I go deep into everyone's backstory. Future chapters would briefly touch on it, but I won't go into too much details. Please note that I have only had 1 bf and the relationship was short, so my knowledge on love is purely based on fanfic and the media.

Speaking of looks, the dresses are the same as the movie. I usually don't add clothing descriptions unless it is necessary. I find it so random to write although you need it to build a scene 😅

Need to catch up? Catch up here!

Ch 2: Girls Just Wanna Have Fun 

“Sasha, who else knows about your fathers coming to your wedding?” 

Sasha turned to her left to face Historia. Sasha, Mikasa, and Historia were laying on Sasha’s bed waiting for the rest of the bridal party to arrive with their dresses. Sasha was in the middle, Mikasa was on her right, and Historia was on her left. 

“It’s just the girls in the group. I didn’t tell any of the guys.” Sasha replies

Mikasa sat up from Sasha’s right. She looks at Sasha and raises an eyebrow. 

“Did you at least tell Niccolo?” Mikasa asks

Sasha paused for a long time before letting out a quiet no. She knew she should tell her fiance, but she wanted all of it to be a surprise for everyone at the wedding (minus the people who already knew). She could tell by looking at Mikasa’s face that she was ready to start interrogating her. Luckily, Sasha was saved by someone knocking and opening the door to her room. 

“Knock knock” their friend, Hitch, enters Sasha’s room followed by the rest of the bridal party: Annie, Hanami, and Mina. All three girls were carrying dress bags (minus Sasha’s wedding dress because she got it yesterday) for the wedding. Mikasa and Historia stood up from the bed to help set the dresses down on Sasha’s bed. They proceeded to hug all of their friends after they finished.  

Sasha met Annie and Hitch while in high school. Both girls were friends before joining the group (although it initially looked one-sided. Annie wasn’t good at expressing her feelings yet). 

Annie Leonhart is Sasha’s Russian friend with blonde hair and ice-blue eyes and loves eating sweets. She dreams of becoming a patissier one day but did not pursue it because of her father. Her father wanted Annie to learn MMA and go pro. Annie’s dad sent Annie to Greece to learn pankration (a form of MMA), but Annie ran off to Kalokairi instead. She never contacted her father, and both had a falling out. Annie was found by Hitch’s parents who let her live in their home. Both girls grew close, and Hitch was the one who encouraged Annie to contact her father after years of silence. Annie eventually forgives her father after he apologizes for everything. Now Annie can pursue her dreams and stay in Kalokairi with Hitch’s parent’s permission. Now Annie attends L’Ecole Ducasse in France to be a patissier and is currently dating Armin Arlet. 

Hitch Dreyse was born in Kalokairi after her parents moved from the Netherlands. Hitch has an easygoing personality and loves teasing her friends, especially Annie. She is also Annie’s first friend as she was the one who was determined to be Annie’s friend after Annie moved to Kalokairi. Hitch also had several admirers in high school, one of them being her current boyfriend, Marlow. Marlow has always had a crush on Hitch for a long time, and they started dating after Marlow finished his first semester at King’s College in London. Marlow would tell Hitch his dreams of working as a politician and Hitch is always his number 1 supporter despite not telling him that explicitly. Hitch attends AAS College for Fashion Product and Promotion (she asks Historia to model for her when possible). Sasha remembers when Hitch’s visits, she would catch Hitch looking out the window as if expecting Marlow to appear. Hitch realized how much she missed Marlow because she cares for him deeply. Hitch knew she needed to tell him her feelings the day his ferry arrived. 

Hitch walks up to Sasha laying in her bed “Look who I found after my trip with Marlo?” She then turned to the rest of the girls who were hugging Mikasa and Historia. It has been years since they have seen one another. All of the girls (minus Sasha) decided to go their separate ways after graduating high school. Hitch was the only one who stayed within the country. She would visit Sasha every now and then during her free time. Sasha decided to stay in Kalokairi to take care of her mom. 

Sasha’s friend group started out with her, Connie (who moved to Kalokairi from Wales), and Marco. Jean joined the group because Marco is his best friend. Jean moved to Kalokairi with Marco and his parents from France. Jean and Marco now own their own house they currently use for visits. Eren, Mikasa, and Armin (who is orphaned and lives with Eren) joined next because Mikasa started hanging out with Sasha after Sasha constantly begged Mikasa to help her study. Eren and Armin followed Mikasa naturally. Annie joined next, followed by Hitch and Marlow after Sasha invited Annie to eat some sweets together at the hotel. Hitch was surprised Annie started making more friends, and Marlow followed because of his crush on Hitch. Hanami joined the group because she helped Sasha out in school. Hanami also covers for her in many situations (any situations involving food and sneaking). Niccolo joined the group after their first meeting and when he surprised Sasha in Kalokairi. He also grew close to Jean and Connie before visiting, and they came up with the idea. Mina is the recent friend to join the group. Marco went to Brown University in America to study education. Marco met Mina one day on campus, and the two often had classes together. The two eventually begin dating, and Marco often brings Mina on his visits to Kalokairi to meet his friends and go sightseeing.

Sasha looks at the group near the door. She was curious how Hitch convinced Annie to come since she should be on her date with Armin. 

“I was having a nice date with Armin until Hitch” Annie glares at Hitch “decided to end it and dragged me here.”

Hitch laughs and waves a hand in the air “I told you this morning we were meeting with the others at 10. It was 9:50 when I came by, and you were still eating breakfast with Armin. You left the hotel at 8:30. No one takes an hour and twenty minutes to eat breakfast.” Hitch turns to Annie with a mischievous smile on her face “Besides, Armin is not alone, and he’s very understanding with me stealing you. He has Marlow, and I’m sure they are preparing for the wedding as we speak.” 

Sasha turns to Mina and Hanami wanting to hear their explanations. Hanami spoke first “I left Jean so he could work on his Best Man duties. I ran into Mina and Marco on my way to the dress shop. Marco insisted for her to help me, and we ran into Hitch who already had Annie.” Sasha turns to Hitch and Annie. Annie was trying to defend herself while Hitch was laughing at Annie’s embarrassed face. Armin and Annie must have gone sightseeing or something and lost track of time. 

“Anyways” Hanami interrupts the two while Mina goes to Annie and holds her arm for Hitch’s safety. “We need to try on our dresses, and I already got them altered. I want to see if I need to make any more last-minute changes before the wedding.” She then walked over to the bag with her name on it and motioned for the others (minus Sasha) to follow and get changed.

“I’m so excited about the wedding! I really like the color of the dresses you picked Sasha” Mina says as Sasha helps her with her dress. She turns to Sasha and gives her a sweet smile. 

Sasha was glad to have someone like Mina in her friend group. She’s going to have to thank Marco for encouraging Mina to join later. 

“I agree,” Hitch says as she puts on her dress “the guys haven’t seen what we look like either. We are going to blow them away for sure” Hitch tossed her hair a bit for an effect and laughed. She turned to Annie with another mischievous smile.

“I know Armin would be over the moon after seeing you in your dress, Annie. You could accidentally spill some wine on your dress, and Armin would still think you’re beautiful” Annie’s face turned red and she jumped a bit because of Hitch’s words. Luckily, she didn’t move around too much or Sasha would have accidentally caught Annie’s skin when she was zipping up her dress. She finished zipping up Annie’s dress before moving towards Historia to help her with her dress. 

“Isn’t over the moon a bit much?” Annie sputters, her face was still red “I’m sure Marlow would be speechless after seeing you in your dress, Hitch. You haven’t seen each other for a while and only started dating recently. I wouldn’t be surprised if he faints after seeing you.” Annie says with a serious face

Hitch gushes and hugs Annie “You always know what to say” she cries. Annie only rolls her eyes while awkwardly patting Hitch on the back. Annie may not look like it, but she actually cares about Hitch.

Meanwhile, the other girls had their dresses on and were busy taking mirror selfies with Sasha’s mirror to send to their significant others (Mikasa and Hanami also took part; although they are both single). Hitch notices and lets go of Annie. She puts her hand on Annie’s back and pushes her to the rest of the girls to join in. 

“Ymir is going to love this,” Historia praises herself after Annie joins the group and takes more mirror selfies. She switches the camera to the front camera and raises her arm to take a few group selfies. “And send” Historia sends the pictures to Ymir and then to the rest of the girls to keep for themselves. 

“I wonder what Armin is gonna think?” Hitch says out loud and nudges Annie on the side. Annie rolls her eyes but still smiles because of Hitch. Hitch then looks up to find Sasha and Mina texting their significant others. She looks over to find Hanami walking around the room to check on the dresses. Mikasa is silently staring at the photos. She looked like she was in an internal conflict with herself to pick which one she would send to the receiving end. Hitch has a 99.9% guess it was Eren. It looks like Hitch is going to play matchmaker again. If it worked for Annie, then it would work for Mikasa. Sadly, Hitch is missing her partner in crime, Ymir, for this. 

“Hey, Mikasa. Are you thinking of sending those photos to I don’t know, a certain someone, perhaps? I don’t know. Eren? Hitch asks with a cat-like grin and wiggles her eyebrows. “You’re one of the only girls in the group who is still single, and everyone knows about your crush on Eren, except for Eren himself!”

All the girls in the room sighed. Eren cares about his friends and family, but he is also pretty oblivious about Mikasa’s feelings. Eren is so focused on passing med school to be a doctor like his father that everyone thought he would stay single forever. Nevertheless, Mikasa still fell for how passionate Eren is to achieve his goal.

Mikasa flushes with embarrassment. Hopefully, no one noticed the old scarf with her stuff. Mikasa likes to keep the scarf with her because Eren was her first friend after moving to Kalokairi. She chooses not to wear it now because of the heat. 

Mikasa quickly scans at the other girls in the room and spots Hitch’s next target. At least there’s someone who is also single to get Hitch off her chest. 

“Say, Hanami, do you have any potential boyfriends in mind?” Mikasa asks casually to divert Hitch’s attention away from her. She doesn’t want Hitch to pull an Armin and Annie with her and Eren. She prefers not to have others meddle with her love life. Mikasa prefers for it to happen naturally (who knows how long that would take?)

Hitch gasps and runs over to Hanami while she is smoothening out her dress. Hitch grabs Hanami’s shoulders and starts shaking her back and forth. “Well, do you?” Hitch asks while shaking her. Hanami is the only other girl in the group (other than Mikasa) who is currently single. 

“Nope. Definitely not me” she laughs and lightly pushes Hitch off of her “I’ve been busy too preparing for Sasha’s wedding and college. I mean I have talked to a few guys since I came back, but I was only flirting with them.” She pats Hitch’s shoulder and sits down on Sasha’s bed. She pulls her phone out of her bag and starts texting someone. Hanami occasionally flirts with guys every now and then. Dating would be nice, but it is not her biggest priority. Besides, she's been busy working alongside Jean for the wedding. 

Hitch only hums and decides to not press her further (for now). She walks towards Historia who is sitting on a chest near the door while texting Ymir. Hitch had a plan in mind, and she needed someone to help. She calls her to Historia quietly and leans down to subtly whisper to her ear. She didn’t need Hanami or Mikasa to hear what she had to say. 

Historia raises her eyebrow to let Hitch know she is listening.

“Normally I would ask Ymir to help me, but you’re my next best hope Historia” Hitch whispers to Historia. Hitch looks over the room and her eyes on the others to make sure they weren’t eavesdropping on their conversation.

Historia laughs quietly “I agree. What do you have in mind?”

“Well,” Hitch begins and looks at Mikasa who is now looking at herself in the mirror with Sasha and Mina. “We all know Mikasa and Eren should get together. It’s pretty obvious, and I’m positive I saw that old scarf sticking out of Mikasa’s luggage earlier.” 

She turns her attention towards Hanami who joins the other girls. “Now as for Hanami, she’s a different case. She may or may not have accidentally spilled a few secrets to me when we went drinking with the girls one night. Now I know the perfect guy for her, but she’s too focused on Maid of Honor duties to notice. We just have to give them both a nudge if you know what I mean?” 

Historia knew exactly what Hitch was implying and who the guy was. She had a suspicion about the two since high school, but she never pursued the idea. She leaned slightly towards Hitch while watching the others with her.

“If my guesses are correct. I’m going to assume it’s him right?” 

“I think we are on the same page, Historia.” Hitch smirks “We just can tell either him or Hanami. You in?” 

Historia holds out her hand for Hitch to shake. “Alright. I'm in.” They shake hands to confirm their agreement. It looks like this trip is going to get a lot more interesting than before. 

Meanwhile, during Hitch and Historia’s secret conversation, Sasha stood behind Mikasa, Mina, and Hanami as they looked at themselves in the mirror. They were in their own little bubble admiring themselves in the mirror while ignoring the upcoming plan on the other side of the room. 

“You did so well with these dresses, Sasha” Mina compliments Sasha for the second time that morning.

“We’re gonna look fabulous tomorrow,” Hanami says joyfully. Both Hanami and Mina caused Sasha to blush.

“Thank you. I just want the perfect wedding and I want my father to give me away.” Sasha leans down and lays her cheek on Mina’s head

“I hope you got yourself a wide aisle, Sasha” Mikasa smirks, causing Mina and Hanami to laugh. Sasha playfully slaps Mikasa’s back “I will know my father as soon as I see him.” 

A knock interrupted the girls, and Niccolo enters the room. All of the girls turn to him.

“Niccolo!” the girls (minus Annie and Mikasa) scream as they open their arms for a group hug. Hitch and Historia came up with an idea and pulled the group to fall on Sasha’s bed with Niccolo

“Hey put me down” Niccolo laughs as he falls “I’m about to get married tomorrow. Can someone help me?” Annie and Mikasa help loosen the girls' grip on Niccolo and help him stand back up. Meanwhile, Sasha was laughing at her friend’s silliness. The rest of the girls stand up from the bed and move to stand in front of Niccolo

“So what do you think about the dresses?” Historia asks

“Niccolo, tell Annie that Armin is going to faint after he sees her in this dress!” Hitch complains and points at Annie

Annie lightly slaps Hitch on the head. “Knock it off, Hitch,” she says with a red face. The others were laughing at their antics. 

“You all look beautiful” Niccolo laughs and compliments the girls “I’m sure Armin will faint after seeing you, Annie.” 

“See! At least Niccolo agrees with me!” Hitch walks over to Niccolo and hugs him. She doesn’t care if the pins on her dress poke her body. At least someone agreed with her statement. She knows Annie well enough to consider herself as Annie’s best friend. 

There was another knock on Sasha’s door and it opened again to reveal Jean and Eren. 

“Eren! Jean!” Historia screams and runs to Jean’s arms. Mikasa smiles and walks to Eren. 

“Hey Historia” Jean smiles and turns to Mikasa 

“Hey Mikasa” Mikasa turn to him in Eren’s arm and smiles at him as well

Jean coughs lightly into his fist. He also had a small red tint on his face. “The guys missed you all” 

“I was wondering what was taking you so long, Niccolo,” Eren states after hugging Mikasa. He noticed how her face was red, but didn’t want to push her by asking when everyone else is in the room. 

“Sorry, Eren. I was busy talking to the other girls. Can you grab some of the stuff for me?” Niccolo lets go of Hitch and walks towards Sasha. He walks behind her and hugs her from behind. He kisses her cheek and the other girls gush on how cute he and Sasha are.

“Sure, Niccolo. Eren looks down at Mikasa in his arms “Can you help me, Mikasa? Who knows how much Jean would get done?” Eren rolls his eyes and smirks. Mikasa glances at Eren. ‘Maybe he knows something?’ She thought and plans to ask Eren about it later. 

Niccolo looks down at Sasha “You have a good eye with the dress choice. bet you’ll look even more gorgeous in your wedding dress.”

“Well, I had Hitch help me too.” Sasha laughs “It’s nice to hear coming from the man who is also baking the wedding cake. I heard you let Annie help you as practice, right?” Sasha asks and raises an eyebrow 

“She insisted on helping as practice for patisserie school. She wanted it to be a surprise, but someone (most likely Hitch) told you too early. I’m sorry about that” Niccolo raises an arm and scratches the back of his neck. He had a nervous face too.

Sasha loops her arms around Niccolo’s neck and leans up to peck on the lips. She looked into Niccolo’s hazel eyes as she spoke, “What did I ever do to deserve you? I’m glad you are okay with letting my friends play bigger roles than just bridesmaids. I can tell how happy they are to help.” 

Niccolo grins like a boy in love “It helps us save money to go travel, and after-” Niccolo’s face contours to love “we can open a restaurant together”

Sasha smiles “Here?” she inquires

Niccolo kisses Sasha’s forehead and looks down at her “Wherever you want, Sasha. I love you too much that I would follow you to the ends of the Earth if you tell me too”

Now Sasha is smiling like a girl in love “I love you too, Niccolo.” 

Meanwhile, Jean picks up a cowboy hat after hugging Historia. He walks to Niccolo and Sasha (while they are in their little bubble) and places the hat on Niccolo’s head. Jean then walks over to Sasha’s bed where Hanami is standing while she is busy typing on her phone. She didn’t notice Jean heading her way. Most of the people in the room were too busy with their own thing to notice. Historia and Hitch were the only two people to notice.  

Jean stands next to Hanami and proceeds to rest his arm on top of her head. He slightly leans down to look at her, but he doesn’t look at her phone. Jean knows better than to look at someone’s business. 

“Jean, knock it off. Go do that to someone else like Mikasa” Hanami says with an irritated tone in her voice and a red face. She swats her arm up in an attempt to remove Jean’s arm off her head. Jean put his arm back no matter how many times Hanami tried to take it off. 

“Hmmm, I’d rather not. You’re short enough for me to be a good armrest ” Jean teases Hanami and puts his arm on her head again. The 11-inch difference is a fun thing for Jean to mess with Hanami with. It’s not his fault he had a huge growth spurt in high school. 

“There are girls here who are shorter than me!” Hanami grumbles and gives up after a few more failed attempts. She is still red from embarrassment. She didn’t understand why he didn’t do that to Mina and Historia (Annie is out of the question unless you want to end up on the floor). Hanami just crosses her arms instead and frowns as Jean instructs Eren to pick up what’s left for the bachelor party. Hanami didn’t notice Historia and Hitch laughing to themselves after watching the whole thing going on. Mina slightly breaks off her conversation with Annie and turns to Historia and Hitch. Looks like someone noticed after all. 

‘We’ll tell you about it later’ Historia whispers to Mina

“I got everything we need for the bachelor party Niccolo. We can go now.” Eren tells Niccolo and holds up the box of stuff. Sasha perks up and turns around in Niccolo’s arms to face him “Yes, you need to go. Us girls are very busy at the moment.”

Sasha proceeds to push Niccolo towards the doors. Jean (finally) takes his arm off of Hanami’s head and is still smirking at her irritated face as he leaves. Eren follows the two but turns around before heading out

“You look beautiful in that dress, Mikasa.” Eren compliments and gives the girls a two-finger salute before leaving. Mikasa blushes at his statement, and Sasha closes the door after all of the guys have left. The girls stood there, and their mouths were open with shock. 

Hitch claps her hands to get everyone’s attention. “Ok, now that we know how great Mikasa looks in these dresses, thanks to Eren, let’s change so we can go to the beach later.” Hitch turned to Mikasa and Historia. “You brought your swimsuits, right?” 

“Yes,” Historia says cheerfully. Mikasa was not as cheerful because she was still blushing after Eren’s compliment. Speaking of Eren, she is not letting Sasha run out without answering her question. 

“Sasha, you did not answer my question from last time. Did you tell Niccolo about your fathers?” Mikasa asks as she begins taking off her dress. The other girls, except Historia, look at each other while helping each other get out of their dresses. It seems like they already knew the answer.

Sasha puts her hands on her hips. “No, because Niccolo would tell me to tell my mom.”

Mikasa was not going to let it down. “Hange is going to kill you when she finds out” she argues.

“I doubt Hange would pull a Levi on her only daughter. The worse she could do is break a table with a kick” Hanami chimes in while putting her clothes back on. 

Of course, she must have read Hange’s journal too because she also found it with Sasha. All of the girls nodded in agreement. Hange loves Sasha too much to actually hurt her.

“Well it will be too late when Mom finds out,” Sasha says confidently and with a smile on her face

The others were already done changing, and they stared at Sasha again. They all had a worried look on their faces. Who knows what chaos would ensue when Sasha’s fathers arrive on the island?

Sasha, noticing the worry on her friend's faces, moves from her spot near the door and sits down on her bed. The others move to stand in front of Sasha. She looks up to her friends with a hopeful look on her face.

“All my life, I felt like something was missing, and when I finally met my father-” Sasha smiles at the thought of finally reuniting with her father. Sasha has never had an actual father in her life. The only person she can name who counts as a father-figure is Moblit, her mom’s assistant. He helped her Mom run the hotel and take care of Sasha since she was 2. Now, Sasha is going to finally meet her actual father “-everything will fall into place.” 

©: This is where I insert all rights reserved stuff. This story belongs to me. Do not modify or republish

Yes, I'm aware the title is not a song by ABBA. I plan on using older songs like 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' to chapters scenes where no one is singing in the movie. I hope you enjoyed this week's chapter! The plot will actually move in the next one, I promise. I may or may not have been smiling like an idiot when I wrote the Nicosasha scene lol. I kinda based it on how I want my future bf to be like. A girl can dream haha.

I’ve had that head as armrest thing happen to me before. I find it odd because I’m considered average height lol. 

Mikasa’s great aunt I mentioned last chapter is Kiyoomi. I never said her name because I didn’t want to spoil anything

I remember an ask from @fanmoose12​ blog asking about Jeankasa. The question is, is it endgame? 😏

Again, I hope y'all had a good Valentine's day. I hope you stay safe (if you are experiencing the winter storm)

Thank you so much for reading!

[parviocula]

UM hmm are you swapping the v chara model with npcs to have different poses? any of the camera/model swap/npc spawns type mods you happen to use im interested to kno. aND any fashion mods u would reccomend, like clothes and hair ect! also my game is completely vanilla, is there still a weird thing about having to roll back the vers of the game to be able to mod? its been that long bbfjshc

I gotcha love read below for a phat list.

Do NOT roll back the version!

Make sure in your directory (assuming you are manually modding which you should do) is that you have a MOD folder, the game no longer supports Archive Folder.

should look a little somethin like this *beep*, I use steam tho.

First step is to download CET ! This is required for pretty much 99% of the mods & it's a very useful tool my friend.

AMM for swaps & spawns (save then reload to see a swap work). You can also spawn in decor and save it so you can make pretty apartments that you stole properly bought!

Now for my angles n all that sweet jazz I use Otis' Free Cam that is behind his patreon. If you're clever though you may find it posted on another site. I however, am sworn to secrecy.

Oh & don't forget RESHADE!

Okay those are the staples! Here's the fun stuff.

PinkyDudes Mods! Sweet Camera Unlocks & awesome Steal Their Looks! Give it a chance!

I use 4k Textures from HERE (demanding) ALONG with THIS mod.

GOTH MAKEUP

EGIRL MAKEUP

Better Boobies

Ferrets Poses although I am currently using a discord exclusive one.

I don't use a lot of clothing mods TBH or if I do I honestly do not keep them for very long, so I rec you take a look HERE & see if anything catches your eye. I've probably used just about every single one.

Arasaka Arms 4 that Corpo look or y'know Solo, whatever you prefer (I installed all options because I swap a lot, like A LOT)

EREBUS ARMS (check author for more options)

CYBER ARMS

I also use Arasaka Cyberware when I'm feeling it, might actually use that rn, thanks!

Some awesome CYBERWARE mods if you're into being a METAL -HEAD.

Kala's Eyes for the Eyes.

If you're into a more Natural look I suggest THESE.

For Hairs I recommend these

Hair 1, Hair 2, Hair 3, Hair 4

YOUNG ROGUE HAIR

MILF OLDER ROGUE HAIR

[seemsdykely]

tagged by @birdcage books i'm hyped to finish or plan to read in 2022. ty for thinking of me, fren!

i’d be interested in seeing this for literally anyone interested in doing it tbh but i also have no pressure tags for: @hipeerpressure, @bzeitgeist. @archistratego, @angryinterrobang

so i’m in a weird reading place where i managed to consume like. maybe two entire books in the last three to four years until the last three months of last year when i suddenly began gulping words down and finished the year off having gone from zero to seven?? i’m very happy about this! i missed reading so much!!

i’m currently plugging through the body keeps the score, which is taking a while because i have to stop every now and then and lie prone with an arm over my eyes going ‘ooooh fuck’ while i process—after that i’m looking forward to my Serious Thoughtful Book being either my grandmother’s hands or in the realm of hungry ghosts so that i can read someone else’s voice tbh. the book is proving very useful and relatable but while i am pretty sure i LIKE dr. bessel von etc and while i have a lot of respect for his clearly huge and hugely empathic brain i also find his like. writing voice? a little punchable at times as we get more into things so another narrator will be a welcome change.

there’s always poetry. even when i couldn’t focus on anything long enough to finish a short story: poetry. szymborska is a fave but i’ve never really done a deep dive so i’m really excited about that one. but right now i’m in the middle of i shimmer sometimes too which i don’t really want to finish because it’s so fucking good so i am full of grumpy anticipation about starting another book because it means i’ll be done with experiencing this one for the first time. a blessing of a problem to have.

passing strange is from @hipeerpressure and therefore i’m very excited about it. i hope you all have a person you trust explicitly to recommend books to you (no pressure, babe).

haven’t read butler since my Super Functional ‘i guess i will perform cisheterosexuality and just exist as my real self in my head for forever??’ days and am hoping to have a more useful but overall less intensely alienating experience this time to be perfectly honest!! reading butler as a whatever-i-am right before the pressure of a hilariously unsustainable survival model cracked me like an egg was uh. sure something. i remember zero content.

the others are less specifically exciting, more soaking up stuff. missed her and dangerous families and genderqueer: easing back into reading Books by snagging Collections Of Writing. Short Things disguised as Books, if you will.

aaaand darnielle is darnielle and i have predictable me-feelings abt him (and universal harvester affected me greatly at a time when i was not really experiencing most emotions in a way that i could like—parse? relate to? so i’m excited about this book the way you might get excited about parachuting when you’re ninety-eight percent sure your harness won’t snap).

[namaikiii]

Twst Ch 5 Thoughts

[Testing out to see if Tumblr eats this one]

I have a problem with Rook: He speaks French. Rook, where did you learn French? Is there a France in Twisted Wonderland? How is French cuisine a commonly known thing in Pomefiore? And if so, where is this France? How can there be a place that speaks French or a Japan for Lilia to learn about natto if Crowley has never heard of our world in his 100 year career? How does this world work???? or maybe the problem lies with us/Yuu

Random Spacefiller Before the Cut: Leona living up to the phrase “cats hate collars”

Rest is under the cut to avoid spoilers (also it’s lengthy):

[Spoiler 5-10] Jamil: Kalim, it’s fine if you don’t (clean gym with ADeuce)……This line really stuck out to me because although we’ve seen Jamil be concerned over Kalim before, it’s the first time he’s showing signs of caring AFTER their incident in Ch 4 (AKA new relationship standing is: we are not friends) and it also invokes a different attitude.

Part of it is still probably out of habit, old-Jamil would say a master shouldn’t be doing the work of a servant. Another part I feel like is guilt. Having Kalim follow his orders (even though it wasn’t directed at him) might’ve triggered Jamil to how he treated Kalim in Ch 4. And his discomfort shows that he’s reflected on his actions and knows he was in the wrong. Grim comments the change in Jamil is extreme (duh Grim, his quick turnaround is thanks to his maturity, unlike some Overblotters…). The thing with Jamil is his growth will never by shown explicitly due to his nature, but the small snippets of focus on him give enough to read between the lines.

And throughout Ch 5 we see Jamil still keeping an eye on Kalim from afar, and his expressions are pensive. Kalim is showing signs of putting himself as an equal with Jamil by doing the same tasks as him and learning to put in effort at improving himself so that he may compete with Jamil on equal footings. And Jamil has to fight back old habits of giving in his victories to/coddling Kalim (thereby enabling his ignorant helplessness) and learn to let Kalim (and himself) go through the process so that they can both mature as their own person. And I think this growth between them will develop further in this chapter. Also I high key love Kalim’s reasoning for picking his favorite story. The boy believes in 2nd chances and redemption arcs.

It’s a bit of a pity that Jamil’s frustration was directed towards Kalim instead of the social system of the Land of Hot Sands itself, because he clearly is grappling with himself on his opinion of Kalim (yesss Jamil, be friends. He’s a good guy and you know it). But then again, he’s a teenage boy so it’s understandable that he’s unable to see past the oppression in his immediate space to see the issue in light of the big political picture of it all. And it seems that our overblotters suffering from twisted oppression(s) of this world outside of their control seems to be a common theme.

[Spoiler 5-21] So at this rate, we’ve technically had a sleepover with Savanaclaw, and Octavinelle, and now with Heartslabyul/Scarabia/Pomefiore. Will we get to finish the set with Ignihyde and Diasomnia? Will Malleus finally get invited to something???

Thoughts on Vil so Far: Coincidentally, while playing through Ch5, I came across an article talking about how ultra-Independence is a trauma response and while reading it, a lot of it resonated with Vil from what we’ve observed of him so far. From what I gleaned, characteristics of ultra-independence is:

A survival mechanism stemming from a past trauma (neglect/abuse/bullying/grief/etc.)

Tend to be the rulers of the household (They run the show)

Take on all the responsibilities/decisions because they don’t trust others to make the correct decisions (micromanage)

Results in too much responsibility on one person –> Become overwhelmed/unable to cope with the pressure

Asking for help/Admitting they are not coping is terrifying

Tend to take on codependent relationships (allows them to fix others which gives them a sense of security/control rather than a person who tries to help them)

And in the same order, I’ll relate the observations and how it pertains to Vil:

He holds bitterness to his past/hometown for whatever he experienced there (humiliation?) and is disillusioned by the concept that hard work will bring good results (the falsity of which he is currently experiencing due to, despite all his efforts, Neige is still “#1″). In Deuce’s SR Lab Coat story and other instances, he always scolds those who ask for help without putting in their own effort first.

Uh…..Dorm lead. Fairy Gala/His movie club projects/This training camp also show how much he invests in directing to make sure everything is as perfect as can be

Same as above, the strictness of his lessons in Fairy Gala, the nitpickiness of the smoke color in his Lab Coat Story, his critiques during lessons as well as managing everyone’s diet and skincare

We’re seeing him slowly slip and act out of character like standing blankly in the middle of the hall (every time that ink blot drips yo). Also I could add in the way his severity towards Epel is becoming more and more unreasonable and more of living a projection of his own desires through someone else (tiger mom anyone?)

Rook knows what’s up. Despite others seeing Vil as a very strong and confident personality, Rook’s description of him suggests something fragile and needs to be looked after. More so especially if the person in distress is unable to ask for help himself

His interaction with Azul in Azul’s SR Ceremony Robe story and Jade in Jade’s SSR story shows he is another one of those who hates being indebted to others. He will not be a charity case. His general relationship with Rook is also very quid pro quo. And the whole nosiness of him constantly getting involved in improving others to reach their full potential (he wanted to continue Fairy Gala boys’s modeling career even when it was unnecessary).

Rook mentions how he and Vil are excited for the first years to break out of their shells and show their true beauty and tbh I hope that means one step closer to finding their Unique Magic. Let it happen dang it! Also, when Vil OBs, I see Rook reacting in 1 of 2 ways: him with his beauty optimism will still find OB Queen as Beauté! in its own way OR  he’ll call it out that Vil has strayed from his true beauty (AKA: for once, you no beauté!). But he’ll help get his Roi de Poison come back to his senses and back on track. Yah I’m leaning towards option 2.

Yeah that was an essay but I’m loving Ch 5 so far because! MORE SCARABIA BOYS SCREENTIME AND DEVELOPMENT. and also lots more info on Twst lore. Thanks for reading!!!!!